You turn into your icon every night

What happens?

 

I slay heartless and care more about ice cream than one of my best friends.

 

I lament my existence as a two-dimensional image in a torturous, I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream-esque fate.

Less literal: I become a freaking stud muffin and have all the girls after me.

...And all the guys.

...And all the monsters.

...And the Devil.

 

I plan on the destruction of this pitiful planet and hope to find a better one. One where a shining future can be made.

 

I fight and defeat the immortal Witch-King of whom it is said no living man can kill. I almost die in the process, but then I make it through alive and fall in love with Faramir.

 

Well, I become the worlds best detective of course and I now eat lots of sweets.

 

I hide away from every 12 year old girl because they ship Inuyasha and Kagome more.

edit: also im bleeding
edit2: well im a gollum in this but lets ignore that

 

I can fight servants


I swear to GOD I will give someone $120 through paypal if they get this.
SWEAR
TO
THE LORD!

 

I get it .

 

I would say Fate. But I'm not sure. Give me the money regardless.

 

Nothing much changed.

I'm pretty sure you mean Shiki.

 

I slay Aragami with my big red Aragami-devouring chainsaw.

 

I prance in meadows of golden flowers. I am adorable.

 

Besides the whole having to deal with a dumb omnipotent(oxymoron?) ***** and being involved with alien plots, pshycic abomonations and other supernatural phenomena.

You only get half the joke
But close enough, hold on let me put some money into my Paypal first.

 

I'm a call-girl with a suitcase of cocaine on the run from the mob AND the police.

So not all that different from my daytime persona.

 

I'm an idiot. :/

 

I'm a fifteen yer old boy who travels around with a talking duck and dog who are both over fifty years of age (pedophiles) and search for my best bro while leaving my hot, sexy girlfriend who loves me all alone on a beach... by herself... on a whole island where guys can hit on her and they can have sex and I'd NEVAH know.

Also, I cry when I find my bro and I have a bro inside of me (a bro without the heart, ya know?).

I know. Cool story, right bro?
Want me to tell it again...?

 

.......Sing about coconuts and tell Sarabi to hook up some damn DSL.
Also be prepared.

 

I'd be your best bro and leave you ice cream and pictures which you somehow thing is a clue and coincidentally you figure it out from that. Also I'd use darkness to beat your other bro inside you.