You Should Read This, It May Be Too Late Tomorrow

Hey everyone, SSU here and I'm writing a new short story, and I thought, why not have my fellow KHV friends read it, give me feedback and comments, I would appreciate it much. So if you could, just read and respond, I will be updating this later on too! Thanks everyone!!! :D

PART 1: This is Only the Beginning, I'm Only Trying to Survive​

It's 2020, zombies are all around us. Not one person is safe, not one person is trusted. I'm running out of food, I have 6 bullets in the chamber, and only a handful of shot gun shells. I'm losing the race, my life will be taken any time now. I heard a story of a hotel, where they keep the zombies at bay. Surrounded by a metal encasing, inside two tons of bricks, and chicken wire fencing. I feel if I can make it here, I can make it just long enough to get home. If there is still a home there.

PART 2: I'm Stepping Out into an Apocalyptic Tomorrow​

There's so much I wish I could describe right now, sitting in this dark room, little to no food; I may not even be able to survive the rest of the week. All I wanted to do was make it home, I don't even know if anyone else is alive. It's been days since I've made contact with the outside. Last time when I went out, I was almost attacked. I ran for my life. I didn't think about anything else other than surviving. These people, no, these things, they have no rules, no morals, it's like they only know destruction. They will come for me if I'm not careful. I'm making a plan, I need to get out of here; the big city is no place to be at a time like this. I'm going to get out of here, and head east, to the coast, I heard on the radio about a safe haven for non-"infected". So it's a disease? It can be cured right? Or not? These things, they don't comprehend what is going on, they just attack.....If I'm going to leave, I have to get more supplies, and I have to find my damn car keys....it's so pitch dark in here, I find myself bumping into things all the time. If I don't leave soon, it's only a matter of time until they get me. God, keep me protected.

PART 3: The First Steps are Always the Hardest​

I opened the door, for the first time in days. What I seen looked typical, typical in the sense that this has been going on for months now. Cars crashed, blood everywhere, gunshots off in the distance, and the smell.....the smell of rot and death. I don't know how anyone could stand it. The only thing that seemed different this time, was the feeling of the sun's warmth. Trapped inside that house was cooling, but it couldn't be anything compared to stepping out into the California weather. I studied my surroundings, listened, if there were any sorts of growling heard, gunshots would be made. I began heading for the street. Why I chose to live at the top of a hill puzzles me now. I can't use the car, it's be too loud. '86 Chrysler LeBaron, yeah, tell me that isn't loud. Then it hit me, if I could use the car as a distraction, I would have a lesser chance of those things coming after me. I turned the key, threw it in reverse out of the driveway, once I put it in drive, I could only hope if would go far enough out to disturb a lot of them. As I took a deep breath, I watched the street below, it seemed to be getting further and further away. Now was my chance, I put the car in drive close to the edge of the hill, then nuetral, got out and pushed. As I took a breath of fresh air, I watched the car roll down the hill...

PART 4: Horror Cannot Even Describe What I'm Seeing​

Watching the car roll down the hill, my heart was pounding. As though my chest would explode. This could be my only chance of getting out of here. Looking at my watch, 11:42 a.m., I still had good on time. I continued watching the car, it was veering off the road toward a house! I began to panic. Not even more than 100 yards away the car was going to crash into a house. CRASH! is all I can describe it as. Over the calm of the moment, out came a blood-curling scream. My God! I hit someone! I began running down the hill towards the car as I watched my surroundings. When I finally got to the car, there was no one near the car, nor under it. My heart racing, I held my revolver out, looking around in all directions, that's when I finally seen it, 25 yards away, a group of them coming towards me. Mouths wide as could be, blood covering them from head to toe, and a derranged look in their eyes. There wouldn't be enough bullets to take them out, so I ran towards the nearest house. As I turned the handle I looked behind me and noticed the lot of them coming after me. Luckily the door was unlocked as I went inside and locked the door behind me. Holding the revolver in my hand, I searched all the rooms, first the main floor, then the basement, and finally the upstairs. Most of the rooms looked bombarded as if a theif had come through, drawers scattered, clothes everywhere, furniture flipped completely around. The only place I hadn't seemed to check was the garage. Holding the gun in one hand and the other on the door handle, I tapped on the door with the gun. Hearing no response, I slowly opened the door. I hadn't noticed it was open to the outside driveway. I opened the door all the way, holding the gun steadily, and proceeding to close the garage completely. Looking around inside the garage I spotted a slegehammer and other tools, as well as boxes of ammunition and a handgun. "Today is my lucky day," I thought outloud. Looking around for any signs of other life, I spotted nothing. I pressed the automatic door lock as is seemed to hum loudly and make a bang. It must've gone out! I verted my eyes back to the driveway and noticed those things approaching. "AH ****!" I screamed. Aiming for their heads I managed to take out 3 of them. I ran out and began forcing the door closed. It was almost down when they began crawling under the garage door. With three in the chamber, I ran for the sledgehammer. Pulling it off the wall, I turned around and started striking their heads. Bludgeoning their head, breaking their skulls, and squashing their dead brains, I managed to wipe them out. Holding the handle, I used the sledgehammer to push them back under the garage door and shut the door. With a sigh a relief, I grabbed the sledgehammer, ammunition, and second handgun and closed the door to the garage and locked it.

PART 5:
COMING SOON!​

 

~Moved~ to Original Work =].
Anyhoo, I think your writing's pretty solid, spelling and grammar mostly fine (I did notice a couple of typos and some unneeded punctuation marks); it gives off a real sense of urgency which suits this sort of plot. I like how the reader is not given the name for the main character, it makes it feel like what the protagonist is experiencing is common/widespread, almost relatable like you're in their shoes. I do think that you should perhaps try to work on your sentence flow more, some things are just a little awkwardly phrased and right now it seems a bit choppy. Your parts are also extremely, extremely short, even for a short story, so you may consider expanding upon them a little.
Also, little side note about a possible continuity hiccup: In Part 1 the protagonist mentions that there's no gas left for the chainsaw, but later has no trouble considering driving off in the car. If they were in urgent need of gasoline for the chainsaw, they could have probably just used some from the car.

Overall it's a really cool story so far, so keep it up. Looking forward to the next part. Also, the title is awesome, lol.

 

I know what you mean, I wrote the first part months ago. Maybe back in February? And I just never picked up on that until recently. it's a big error in the writing and i do plan on changing it up.
and you're completely right with the protagonist not having a name, i felt as though giving names would take away from the entire story in some way. a friend of mine actually said that part 3 seems like a journal entry more than a story deal.
and it's not intended to be short segments, it's just, at the time of writing it, i only spit out so much before my brain can't think of anymore.
the titles i just happen to come up with after i finish writing it. as all my writings are.
this was just fun for me, and i plan on adding more, going more indepth, thank you for reading. :)