The Man Rules

The Man Rules
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

Finally , the guys' side of the story.
We always hear ' the rules'
From the female side.

Now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

 

Swipe that from a myspace bulletin, did you?

 

Gamefaqs.

PA'JOWNED!

 

...

 

This thread fails, crashes, and burns D:

 

You owned yourself by making this thread.

 

Learn to count past one D:

 

DrMario64 pretty much ALL girls know most of that Is true =\

So you don't need to tell us. Also, the girls have so many rules because boys normally forget (No offense to those boys who are smart) how we feel or what we like.

Thank You.

 

You haven't fell in...

 

How so?

Please clarify.

 

...

 

Sure the mod system sucks, but it's a good place to get my early morning funnies.

And I tried using the search system but whenever I tried "The Man Rules" it didn't work.

 

...

 

Old. >_>

I made this a while ago.

Literally, bout 6 months ago.

It was one of my first threads. O_o

 

Read it too many times...
Saw this two years ago.
You phail.
Not as hard as Elle Couchy though =3

 

A message to all guys:




























PUT THE FREAK'IN TOILET SEAT DOWN YOURSELF!
have you ever thought we fall into to the toilet if you guys don't remember to put it down!?

 

Has nayone thought of maybe *closing* the toilet when finished? <<

 

that's what I do lol

 

It's what we could ALL do to make each other ess tee eff you =D

 

Or girls could just look before they sit down, I have to stop and lift the seat, they can stop and put it down.