On-Line Dating

Lol, just lol.

I didn't meet her just ounce, we would occasionally go out, but not all the time. Yeah I did hold her, especially when she was about to die goddammit. It would be nice though, if I could everyday, but I always talked on phone, AND internet.

 

Hmmm several things here.

I fully agree that they could be older/younger whatever than they say they are, but personality wise I HAVE to emphasise that that is the same in RL, ok I am going to have to use an example here. I used to date someone in RL who I thought I knew, everything was great, but it turned out I didn't know him at all and I got the bruises to show for it. Not only that, but you talk about knowing them as though they are " a friend since Kindergarten" but there are not that many people I still know from back then. I certainly share more with my online friends as there is that lack of judgement from appearance and background.

True words just come from an empty box, but it is the meaning behind them that is important. "I love you I love you I love you" can be just as empty from a RL person if the feeling isn't there.​

 

That's actually a good reason to on-line date. Imagine how fantastic it would be to see someone you had been going out with after they had been gone for a few months or something.

I see that a lot with stupid couples today, the ones in school that walk around kissing and having sex or whatever when they don't really care about each other. They always say "I love you" like it's saying bye or hi. I feel it's the same on-line, with most relationships at least.

 

I agree, I do think the words "I love you" are used to often now, in some cases making it almost redundant (spelling?).

Also I am pleased you used "most" there ^^ because I agree that some online relationships are not the fairytale that the couple likes to portray, but some are for real. I am happy that you acknowledge not ALL are false. Just like how I acknowledge that not ALL work.

:)​

 

Yeah, I think that with some things I said earlier I came off as a bit rash when I was really speaking my thoughts. This thread has opened my eyes up to the possibility of what on-line dating can do. And while I have a girlfriend and wouldn't do it, I've come to accept it more.

 

Wanna hear something funny Bou?

Sara saved me, I was miserable UNTIL We found eachother. Yes, its online, But its still that same feeling in my heart when I hear her say "I love you" it makes nothing else matter around me, and puts my mind at peace. Everyday I wake up angry due to personal things that happened in my past, and everyday the first thing she says either on the phone, or online is "I love you" and it calms me to a peacful state of mind again. I would lay my life down for her, and she would do the same to me. I wanna ask you, How many 'Real couples' can say that? how mny 'Real couples' can truely love each other through thick and thin? Yes, my eyes and mind wander to others on occasion, and I wonder 'what if', but whose doesnt?

 

I can say that about my real life girl friend, so I make 1! but maybe thats just me, how should I know... at least I know my girlfriend would do the same.

At least you two talk on the phone, that does make it a bit better that you've heard their voice, and thusly know them a bit more than just online, even over the phone 'I love you' sounds a thousand times better from someones voice then on a box. at this point we go into subdivisions of online dating

Purely online - this I feel is pointless, however if you so wish, go nuts
online/ phone - better, at least you can get some of the feeling missed through touch by the tones of their voice, cause you can usually tell when someone is serious through their voice, I always felt good when my GF said 'I love you' on the phone...however I felt better when she looked me right in the eye and said it...but maybe thats just me
Online/ real life - Awsome, I have no argument against these people, you see each other in real life, you talk online, theres nothing wrong there
Purely real life - it can be dangerous, but when you find someone truly special to you I think its the best
Real life / online - someone you met in real life who moved away? This happened to me once actually, I tried to keep it, but it just didn't feel the same to be perfectly honest...

 

That is how you see it, I said that everything has a chance of working and failing, both on a omputer and in real life. Talking to someone is a better way to know a person, you get to understand their character, what they like or dislike, being formal or informal, understandiing their good and bad parts of people, if you focus on ones appearence then you will know nothing of them, just that they look different, uglt, pretty, whatever.
Online dating has as much trouble as real life dating, both work in their own ways, actually you've got a less chance of staying with someone in real life then on-line, they both balance each other out.

And I didn't know Arc and Sara were a couple, but I am slow, congrats anyway you two, hope you are happy and stable together!

 

Online dating can be as you have mentioned, people using an imagination or having a lack of social skill so it's an escape at being accepted by someone, even if you never 'see' the person. There are enough online sex chat channels and text chat places where people act so annoyingly childish that it makes you want to barf. Furry places make me want to do that, but hey...to each their own. I just consider these people to be doing a level of 'phone sex' online and it's not going to probably amount to much.

However, I disagree that it is always the case. There are many people who just go online to chats to engage in conversation with people and make very good friends with others. Whether it's just 'text' you see or not, you know those people who become friends are genuine. Friendship to me is the most important part of a relationship, and online, people can and do often express things more liberally than they would off the computer. There are liars, sure, but there are also people who are self confident and do not feel any need to cover up their likes that they may have to conceal to mix in with 'society'. Such examples include: being a Star Trek geek, Kingdom Hearts is a great video game and I'm on a KH site posting all the time, liking certain types of music, disliking certain types of people, political and religious feelings, etc. People can be, in at least civil chats, very accepting of other people's opinions, and at least tolerant. It's easy to be who you really are.

So, what I'm getting at is that online, you may meet someone real with similar likes to you without intentionally looking and wham, you can talk about whatever. People can be friends for several years even before deciding to meet each other outside of chat. What exactly is wrong with that? I don't call that a fake thing at all. As a matter a fact, I'd consider that the two people probably know each other more than others who come face to face, date, have sex etc and just move on without being truly ready. The online separation can be a good thing in that way. Also, if these people truly care for another, they are mature enough to work out ways where they do go meet one another, decide what to do from there etc. They plan their futures.

So, to me, if they are just playing around, doing sex games and imaginary relationship stuff to deal with the fact they have poor social skills and want to just get off, okay...it's a game and well, that's up to them, but it's not what I'd be doing. However, if I met the right person on line as I know some of my friends have and have gotten married to, and they are very happy, I don't see what's wrong with it. I also do not consider those people to have poor social skills as they talk to others, go to work and do things just fine. They just found someone online that was better than what was around them and both were willing to explore the options of getting together. It takes a lot to have a long distance relationship, but people do it, and those who survive it until they get together usually seem to endure better than others who take their relationships for granted.

 

From what I have heard of Online dating It has Its ups and downs....

For Idiots that go on chat sites and go 'Omg ur hot letz go out'....NO! If your going to Online date, do It properly like Arc and Sara...That example Is perfect! But If you know somebody Is wrong for you, you don't stay with them just because you want to.
I have no real grudges with Online dating...I think Its Great! But If your going to Online date...Do It properly.

SOME people (I'm not saying everyone) don't like Online Dating because of past dating and they think Online dating Is horrible and awful and....Well you get my drift.
Now....I hope not many people read this because I don't just go around saying this all the time. So anyway, Ive actually had an Online boyfriend...He didn't go too well so I just pretend Ive never had an Online one or a Real one but It was a very, very bad experience. Now, just after this happened I thought 'Well Online Dating Is Awful! I hate It and other people should hate It too' but during that time I saw other people Online dating and make It turn out perfect so I thought 'Maybe Online dating Isn't too bad...'
But this Is just my secret...And Your lucky If your reading this.

But anyway, I have no problem with It. =)

 

Yeah I agree with you I think online dating is a stupid thing to do and not just because of the safety aspects (which are important) but because of desperation and insincerity. I mean let's face it i'm afraid the vast majority of people who seek online dates are heartbroken, deprived, hopeless, perverted or unattractive. Ahhhh, the silly things people do (in their pursuit) for love.

Yes, yes, there may be exceptions. But it's a big gamble to take in the first place. I think it's better when you meet someone face-2-face and then establish a connection. Anyone can type words, sweet nothings. One would have to pretty naive to fall in love at the faceless and lifeless words on their own computer screen. I guarantee that anyone of us could make any other person here fall in love with them via their own QWERTY keyboards. Ha, what a joke.

Online friendships are OK but I think whatever is online should stay online and never extend it's connection elsewhere.

 

Arc, you said that so perfectly that there were really tears in my eyes.
I agree with you so much here.
Although I have a boyfriend irl now..

(I hate bringing this up on the forums, but I might as well)
For me, dating Darkwatch was perfect. It felt so right.
Sure, sometimes it was hard, but hell it was worth it.

A relationship over the internet can be just as good as one offline.

It's just... A word of warning; it's demanding, and hell, its hard.

 

.......
CtR, Arc and agel have just taken words out of my mouth. i have nothing agaisnt online dating so long as its genuine.

 

Awwwww as I've already explained I've never really approved of OLD but that was sweet, brought a tear to my eye.

But what suprised me is that you to decided to have a relationship despite being staff members here. I'm not saying that is irresponsible of you or setting an bad example I, er, just didn't think it'd be allowed that's all.

 

Wow Arc, that was so sweet. I'm so happy for you ^^
You also stole the words out of my mouth beause it's true. Also there can be ups and downs from what most people have said here.

I am currently having an online relationship (with Dual Wielder) and it's been wonderful for me. Even though we can't see each other we are really commited to our relationship and don't want anything to ruin it.

 

Erm, well, I'm not sure what to say right now to all of your responses to this topic, to be honest. But, I'm in an online relationship with ~Koneko~ and we are happy together. She's made my life a true blessing and she's really made me happy. I mean, just thinking about her brings a smile to my face. And I know she feels the same. I thank God everyday for bringing her into my life. And though when she says "I love you, Danni-kun!!" it's just words, but I know that she does feel that way about me and I feel that way about her.

 

...

 

I agree with the againsts.

There's nothing more that I can say since it's already been said.

 

In my opinion, it depends on how you meet. If it's a dating site, then that's just ******ed. People exaggerate on those things, and I betcha the majority of them end up being abusive relationships. If the couple meets through something that they both have in common, then the relationship will work better and and will actually be worthwhile.

There's also so much less drama when the relationship is online...because people love each other for their personalities rather than looks.

 

Well, to put it gently: It's somewhat concerning. But to the people who do online date, well, good for them, you know? And who knows? Maybe someday they'll have a rendevous in the future. You never know what cards the dealer's gonna give ya, man.
Personnaly, I think I'm somwhere between a yes or no. ''Love has many forms''.