Hey, look! It's time's poetry corner.

Lessons like melodies

When I first seen, I gasped.
When I was alone, I yearned.
When I was upset, I rasped.
When you hurt me, I learned.

As lame as it may seem, my eyes still sting to this day.
I remember my first love, although I try to forget.
Regardless of the attention you did not seem to pay,
You were always my little, lovey-dovey ******.

It is stupid, I know.
He hurt me, it’s shown.
I feel like the memory should go,
Yet over time, all it has done is grow.

So maybe it was idiotic, to think that it was real.
The emotions that flared, I was too young to feel.
We were both stupid in our own little way.
Then again,
That is the lesson we learn at the end of the day. ​

 

I liked it. I really like the last two lines, to me they seemed to tie together the whole poem. Very nice.

 

erm...wow. Intresting, though a little insulting :v

It should be saw, not seen. Seen doesn't...fit, somehow. Second stanza feels like a rant, the final stanza is my favourite.

 

pretty good for a first draft of a poem :D the beat and patterns dont flow very well, but the main idea and emotion is definitely there, so good job :D:D

 

It isn't a bad poem, but it does kind of seem like a rant to me. It doesn't seem to flow like some poetry should.
As Obsessed said, "seen" should be "saw".

Work on the flow and consistency. Other than tnat, it was interesting. c: Keep it up.​

 

Thankyou Hales <3

Thanks, I guess Harriet.
I suppose you might all have to excuse my aggressive writing, it's the mood I've been in at the moment.
Glad you...liked it?
<3

Thankyou :3 <3

Thankyou, and yes, I will work on the consistency of beats and rhythm.
<3

 

Introduction;
I'll keep this short and sweet.
Thankyou for taking the time to read this, and I hope you enjoy my poems. I will update when I can, which might be as often as every day if my brain keeps going at the rate it is..
Well, Enjoy.

***​

Sipping On Emotions.

I’ll knock back a cup of resentment,
Wearing that same old smile,
Swigging a shot of love down my throat,
I swear; it’s been a while.

I’ll guzzle down a yard of hatred,
And grin as you watch me, stunned,
I’ll sip on a cup of fresh-ground failure,
And listen to my heartbeat as it thuds.

I’ll slurp on the remains of your steaming-hot anger,
And scowl as you take it so bitter,
I prefer mine with a shot of sweet old honey,
And I’ll always know that mine tastes better.

I’ll lap up the last of the intoxicating confusion,
And giggle, as I feel very merry,
And follow that with a pint of jealousy,
Not forgetting the hint of raspberry.

I’ll finish my night with a dose of happiness,
But not too much, I fear,
The darker emotions taste sweeter to me,
But I think I’ve already made that clear.

 

Yeah, I like this first one. Anger from a honeyed tongue is always more piercing than just blatantly yelling at someone. Your rhyming has helped tremendously with this too.
Good poem. How come you've started writing them now?

 

I've found that it relaxes me tremendously.
It's just a way of getting my emotions and needs out into the air without threatening to kill someone I guess.

Glad you liked it <3

My last condolences

I never got to say goodbye,
But I suppose none of us do,
When that opportunity does arise,
Our expressions are plastered with a clear, salty residue.

My memories will forever remain,
But some others will disagree.
Some claim that time will run them dry,
But that will never apply to me.

And when the thought of our last encounter,
Brings back those clear, salty tears,
I will promise myself not to think of those bad times,
But more of our golden years.

Perhaps I sound so heartless,
To state that you are in a better place,
But when I splutter and bawl of how things are better for you now,
That will never substitute your embrace.

How warm your loving hugs were,
How gentle your rough hands could be,
How you always said that I will turn out to be the best that I can be.

 

Goodnight and Goodbye

We sat in the classroom,
It was silent again.
You were sulking,
And I was carrying on
As if our previous conversation had not affected me at all.
It had.
X
You spent the whole of break,
With your earphones in your ears,
Arms crossed,
Face sullen,
Bored,
Upset,
Hurt.
X
I laughed with the rest of them,
Swallowing back the lump in my throat,
Every time you looked at me,
Leered,
Glared,
Sneered.
I felt myself die a little inside.
X
You sent me a text that evening,
‘hey. How are u?’ was all I read.
It seemed like you were trying to make a point.
Well, were you?
I don’t care really.
It isn’t as if you wanted to know how I was.
You knew how I felt at that time.
You knew.
X
I seen it again the following day,
And asked you the same question,
It killed your mood again,
Like it had yesterday,
And the day before that...
And the day before that day, too.
I failed to get receive a reply.
As per usual.
X
I got angry that evening,
I wanted to scream,
But we all know I can’t.
I wanted to cry, too.
But I suppose you cried for me that night.
Along with the others that found you.
X
I was the first to discover you,
But I suppose you already know that.
The way you stared at me,
Those large brown eyes shining with fresh salty tears,
I couldn’t speak.
I couldn’t move.
I couldn’t breathe.
X
You looked me,
Smiled goodbye,
I hadn’t taken a breath.
Batted an eyelid,
Uttered a word.


And then you dropped.



​

WHY THE HELL COULDN'T I MAKE THIS RHYME.


...aaaaaaaaaaanywho, this is what my mind comes up with. It doesn't rhyme, no, but it's still kinda poetic.... kinda?

 

I liked this one lots. I felt as though I could relate to it, and that it had a nice smooth flow to the words.
"You spent the whole of break,
With your earphones in your ears,
Arms crossed,
Face sullen,
Bored,
Upset,
Hurt."

This is my favorite part of the poem. I think you've improved a lot since your first poem. Nice job,dear o:

 

;o Thanks hunny <3

The irony song.​

Ironic dreams on dead memories,
Ah, how bittersweet irony sings its praise,
And birds chirping loving melodies,
With old withered faces ending warm summer days.

Chapped lips moisturised from the fresh fallen snow,
Young tongues tapping to words too long,
A mother goose waddling with ducklings in tow,
All in rhythm to the irony song.

Slapdash paving lining the road,
A lovely log cabin,
Healthy abode,
Biting wit mockery lining the streets,
Taunting the pain of sourly trodden feet.

Ironic dreams on dead memories,
Ah, how bittersweet irony sings its praise,
And birds chirping loving melodies,
With old withered faces ending warm summer days.

​

 

I'll do it anyway.

I love how you shake your hips,
To a melody in your head,
And giggle as we try to guess it,
And reveal
After ten minutes of wrong answers
That you made it up yourself.

And then you giggle more. ​

I love how you sing to songs,
When you don't know the words.
And even when you resort to the lyrics,
La la la la,
You still sound better than me.

And yet you still insist I'm better.​

I adore the way you smile,
Your cheeks plump up underneath your eyes,
And you giggle with me,
And laugh at stupid things,
When we both know we shouldn't.

But we laugh anyways. ​

I adore how you talk,
Stating the facts
Standing your ground,
And always backing me up
When it comes down to arguments.

But you call me witty anyways.
​

It’s amazing how you kiss,
With lips so soft,
So that butter wouldn’t melt,
And a mouth so tender,
When you whisper my name.

In reality.
I hate it.

But I say I love you anyways.​

 

I love the way it's sarcastic the whole way through then the last two lines are serious. Nice job *virtual high-5*

 

"With old withered faces ending warm summer days"

Absoluted LOVED this line. The irony poem is so powerful and the adjectives juicy <3

I'll Do It Anyway sounds more like a rant to me. Or just an irritated person talking to themselves. The emotions you're trying to put across in it confuse me- I understand the sarcasm but it almost seemed to come out of nowhere. Regardless, you clearly have talent =3

 

Oh, the irony song came out of nowhere more than the other.
It was rhyming, which made it harder to write than my usual open poetry. I'm glad you liked it <3

I'll do it Anyway wasn't really intended to use sarcasm, actually. It was an open piece of poetry, so you can take it any way you please.
Could you please build on what you mean when you say "Came out of nowhere" ? Because when you use this phrase, which I have seen you do a couple of times now, I don't quite understand what you mean. Am I supposed to write this in a certain way?

Thank you for the CnC <3

 

Not supposed, as such. However, surely the narrator of I'll do it Anyway would have expressed some sort of bitterness or different thoughts within the main bulk of the poem rather than just coming out with something at the end.

Ah, perhaps Im rambling. Honestly, your poems barely need critique.

 

Just like you.

Hey there girl,
You got your high skirt on,
Ass chewing on a thong,
You got your airs about you.

You walk in here,
Earphones in your ears,
Eyes stuck in a leer,
And I’m thinking ‘girl, screw you.’

You sit in your chair,
Messing with your hair,
Although no-one really cares,
They don’t care about you.

You pout at your mirror,
Lip-gloss giving off a shimmer,
Acting like you’re some famous singer,
Damnit I hate you.

Your voice is high,
Like the skirt hovering up your thighs,
I can’t look you in the eyes,
Without wanting to hurt you.

You made a sarcastic comment,
And girl I lost it,
My sanity is blown to shit,
And I want to hurt you.

You were walking all alone,
Less than a mile from home,
But I didn’t care,
I was just behind you.

Your voice turned muffled,
Hair all ruffled,
Caught up in the struggle,
In the plastic coating.

Running out of breath,
Starving for air,
Halfway to death,
Now who’s gloating?

You looked so pretty,
In a dress so frilly,
With that pale complexion,
That cream cushion complimented you.

I felt so grand,
Hearing no reprimand,
For having your blood on my hands,
Now I’m rid of you.

Hey there girl,
I have your high skirt on,
My Ass chewing on your thong,
I got my airs just like you.

Just.
Like.
You.
​

 

I really like this poem, I feel like I could actually relate to it in some way, because sometimes there are people who act plastic; who I just want to hit. What I got out of this, was someone annoyed at the superfical girl, and going over the edge. And at the end, when it said:
"Hey there girl,
I have your high skirt on,
My Ass chewing on your thong,
I got my airs just like you."

It made me think about how it's so easy to be like everyone else, and it's so easy to "kill" someone [or just their reputation] and act like them. But it's hard to actually be yourself.

I really like this poem, it made me reflect on some girls like this in my school o.o
Also, I liked how you wrote this, the format; how most of the lines ended with "you". I don't know if that was on purpose, but regardless of that;
Nice job, Emz.

 

Oh, you have just totally grasped the concept of what I was aiming for.

Thank you so so much Halez, you know I appreciate all your crit.<3

I wrote this a few weeks back, actually. It does have a few personal meanings, I admit.

What's the matter, Hayley?​

What’s the matter, baby?
Dry your eyes,
Let me sing you a sweet lullaby.
Do you feel sad, baby?
You seem rather blue,
Just remember deep down,
That I love you.

How are you feeling, honey?
You seem happier today,
Did my words of comfort,
Make the badness go away?

What’s on your mind, honey?
You look quite hurt,
Have your tears made dark stains,
On your brand new shirt?

Did you hear me, Hayley?
I want to know what’s wrong,
I want you to speak,
Instead of listening to your songs.
Do you hate me, Hayley?
Have I done something,
That has made you upset?
Whatever I did,
I most certainly regret.

What’s the matter, baby?
Dry your eyes,
Let me sing you a sweet lullaby.
Do you feel sad, baby?
You seem rather blue,
Just remember deep down,
That I love you.​