Everything In Kingdom Hearts Explained in layman's terms

Spoiler

Ventus is Vanitas

Master Xehanort made Vanitas from Ventus so they could mush together and make a ******ed looking keyblade to open Kingdom Hearts

They are both Sora

Sora is Roxas

Roxas is Ventus

Roxas is Sion

They are both Sora

Sion is Kairi

Namine is Kairi

Kairi is probably gonna turn out to be Aqua somehow

Aqua made Castle Oblivion

Ventus is chilling in that castle

Organization XIII couldn't find him(lol****)

Ventus's heart went to Sora

Sora probably has like 3 of those by now

Aqua found Xehanort The Apprentice(Terra) at Radiant Garden

He was confused because he is two people and attacked her

Aqua pwnd Xehanort The Apprentice(insert amnesia here)

They both feel in a dark pit of darkness that was really dark

Aqua used her Keyblade and Armor to save Terra and got stuck in the dark pit of darkness that was really dark

That's why Xemnas has her armor and keyblade and he talks to it because it retained some of her memories, etc. just like Terra's armor

Terra is Xehanort The Apprentice

Master Xehanort is Xehanort The Apprentice

Master Xehanort is one with Terra(I WANT TO BE FOREVER YOUNG)

Terra's armor retained some of his memories and his spirit(Lingering Spirit is explained! HUZZAH!)

It kicked Xehanort The Apprentice's ass(insert confusion here) and then sent him to Radiant Garden where Aqua kicked his ass again

Xehanort The Apprentice cannot fight

Master Erauqs is one with Terra who is one with Master Xehanort and they are all Xehanort The Apprentice

Master Xehanort and Terra argue over Erauqs's heart while inside of Xehanort The Apprentice and also argue over who will control their body

Xehanort The Apprentice is Ansem

Ansem is Xehanort’s Heartless

Ansem is Xemnas

Xemnas is Terra

Xehanort’s Heartless is Master Xehanort

Xehanort’s Heartless becomes Riku

Riku is all of the above now

The REAL Ansem is now in the dark pit of darkness that is really dark with Aqua

Master Xehanort's obsession with the X-Blade(See ******ed Looking Keyblade) being remembered by Xemnas is the real reason for the X in all organization names.

Braig is that one cool guy who was watching it all go down and without him none of this would have happened.

Braig helped Master Xehanort bait Terra.

Braig found Xehanort The Apprentice after Aqua pwnd/saved him

Braig probably triggered the slow return of Xehanort's memories because Terra kicked Braig's ass and Master Xehanort worked with Braig.

Braig is credited as being Xehanort's main man in the heartless experiment.

Braig(Xigbar) knows everything and doesn't seem to have told Xemnas anything during the Organization days

Xigbar and Xemnas see Sion as Ventus

Xigbar is the one who actually knows what Xemnas is doing in the Chamber of Sleep

Xigbar is the one who seemed to know what Xemnas was looking for at Castle Oblivion

And THAT is Kingdom Hearts

 

Character recycle is in these days, I hear.

Lolmindblown.

 

tl;dr: Nomura likes playing hot potato with the essential components of man, Xehanort sucks (except for his Heartless), and Braig/Xigbar is the best character in the series.