Don't let the doctor in.

I wanna blow off steam >:|

 

Blow into a Pipe.

It sooths the mind :D

 

Well I don't care what you think, but I've got troubled thoughts and a self esteem to match.

 

You called?

 

I believe they did, sir.

 

Nurse, prepare the festive syringes. You know, the ones that look like candy canes. We want them to see something nice right before they're injected with enough sedative to take down an adult elephant.

 

Righto .

 

I must ask you, where are your qualifications doctor? I don't believe I've seen them before.

 

*Hands you piece of paper with "PhD" written in green crayon*

I believe it speaks for itself.

 

*Looks at piece of paper carefully*

I believe it does. You may go-

Hold on a second. Why is this written in green crayon?

 

We lent the official copy written in purple crayon to Jesus.

 

It means my PhD is in every medical field ever founded by man.

 

Really? Every medical field? Even Harrietology?

 

Especially Harrietology. B|

 

Well, why exactly would they choose to write in green crayon and not a pen?

Green crayon? Seriously? The worst crayon colour ever?

 

Says the person who writes in green text. B|

 

There is a clear difference, sir.

Dark Green Text > Green Crayons.

 

They figured green crayon would look more official.

 

Oh. Okay. Makes sense. Sentence fragment.

 

Well, the good sirs at wherever-they-gave-you-the-PhD were wrong.

Unless they were 3 year olds.