Amethyst's Poetry Thread

Discussion in 'Archives' started by KatDoesThings, Aug 6, 2012.

  1. KatDoesThings Chaser

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
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    Female
    Location:
    Sydney
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    Hey hey!

    So I figured rather than posting individual poems on individual threads, I'll make a poetry thread! (Great idea, right?) :D

    I wrote this one yesterday, cnc is very welcome!
    -----------------------------------------------------------
    MISTAKEN
    You saw them
    An aphotic chocolate
    Were they brown or black?
    Regardless, they were arrows.
    Aiming at your remains
    The final fragment
    Of the fabric
    That frayed
    Constantly
    Consistently
    Every breath you took
    Led you back there
    And your lungs
    Had exceeded their limit
    Your ribcage bruised
    With blindness
    With frustration
    With The Ache
    You see them now
    Darker than before
    Hiding a beast
    Mercy deceased
    ...Or is it?
    All you see are knives
    But all I see is guilt
    Maybe we're both wrong
    And that was our flaw
    Still, I see yours
    A tranquil sapphire
    Masking joy or pain?
    Regardless, they were targets
    A bullseye in progress
    The blue would become
    The burgundy
    That bleeds
    Constantly
    Consistently
    You see the devil with daggers
    But inside
    Is a lonely, lost, little girl
    And all she wants is a hug
    THE TEXT
    My only friend glowed
    Green symbols and your name
    The letters burned my eyes
    And bounced around my brain
    Crowded with questions
    Clouded with cautions
    I know all too well
    Your twisted, taunting game
    A quiet violence
    It sent a seismic wave
    My fingers, my arms, my nerves
    My aimless little veins
    Leading to hollow
    Seeking to borrow
    Never to return
    ‘Its’ torn, tattered remains
    Only a handprint
    Pink refuses healing
    Prominent guilt reminds me
    My cheek should not have feeling
    Painted guilt with force
    Tainted with remorse
    A falsely accused
    Tempestuous twit, stealing
    Cavity had a cause
    A chest without a Beat
    A Boom
    A Break
    An Ache
    Lucky, demons can cheat
    Rhythm out of time
    Stanza out of rhyme
    Torture a heatless
    Until declared defeat
    A virtual code
    Hides an apology?
    Your regretful words
    Sign your psychology
    Demonic dream’s end
    I’ve changed into your friend
    Sudden change of heart
    Taught through technology
    Almost if instant
    The pain fades from my cheek
    And deep inside the hollow
    There’s a
    Beat
    Beat
    Beat.
    FOR OLD TIME'S SAKE
    It was missing
    Supposedly degraded
    In a raging flame
    Of Selfishness
    And Greed
    And Apathy
    And however else you had defined me
    My chest’s abyss
    Its absence defined me then
    My self worth dissolved
    Which satisfied
    Your Need
    And Desire
    To torture my remaining sanity
    The lightbulb sparked?
    Deep within your twisted mind
    It didn’t make sense
    When did that happen?
    And How?
    And Why?
    You really are delusional this time
    In this whole scene
    You were never to be blamed
    Nothing was yours
    It was my heart
    My fault
    My selfishness
    So naturally, I am the demon
    But then you said
    In amongst my confusion
    ‘You’re not a demon
    You are my friend
    So Breathe
    Exhale your stress
    So we can start again, for old time’s sake’
    IS IT A HURT?
    You watch a scene​
    And glimpse a moment​
    Accounting for your status​
    Maybe the reasons aren't clear​
    Yet
    But you can still feel it​
    It was a look​
    That reminded you​
    Of the unforgivable​
    A shriveled heart thrown to waste​
    Yes
    No illusions this time​
    Your stupid mind​
    It pulled the trigger​
    Sent an abundance of pain​
    Through your soul, back to your chest​
    How
    Does that make any sense?​
    But is it a hurt?​
    Or a pain of joy?​
    Is it a sink?​
    Or a jolt in the void?​
    Then there was a kiss​
    And the flashbacks flooded​
    And your confidence frayed​
    As did your ego​
    As did your conscience​
    As I was on the other line​
    Vodka-soaked tears​
    Revitalised my fears​
    And in that instant I knew​
    It wasn't your hurt​
    It wasn't your pain​
    It wasn't an act​
    Of your memory-ridden brain​
    It was a reminder of your mistake​
    That only another fool could make​
    And when that time comes, I'll feel sorry for him​
    GREY

    I only see my world in black and white
    The present is a curse in my twisted little mind
    Everything I see is grey, apart from your blue eyes
    Is that because you're still alive?

    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I love my world in shades of grey

    I like nostalgia, and the games it plays
    I like the memories, they toy with my brain
    I love my world when its all grey

    Too much colour then something's not right
    One more colour and I'll be blinded by light
    Everything I see is grey, apart from your blue eyes
    Is that because you're still alive?

    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I love my world in shades of grey

    I like nostalgia, and the games it plays
    I like the memories, they toy with my brain
    I love my world when its all grey

    You're a fragment that I kept in my mind
    I really am delusional this time
    You're a fragment in this little grey world of mine

    You're a fragment of hope in my day
    You're a part that will never go away
    You're a fragment of colour in my grey

    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I love my world in shades of grey

    I like nostalgia, and the games it plays
    I like the memories, they toy with my brain
    I love my world when its all grey
    -----------------------------------------------------------
     
  2. Peace and War Bianca, you minx!

    Joined:
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    Cisgender Male
    1,282
    I had to read it a second time to get a better feel of it. Good use of some literary techniques, alliteration and imagery that gives you some god poetic feelings.

    It was quite fast and felt a bit stop and start. That's probably because of the short lines you've been using, which speed it up, but yeah I liked the imagery. And I think I get the general story element of it, the arrows and knife imagery is quite interesting.

    Anyway, good poem. I liked reading it! : )
     
  3. Styx That's me inside your head.

    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2008
    318
    Much like PaW, I read it twice in order to get some clarity out of it. That's not a bad thing in this case, since the poem itself was a pleasure to read. I like how you seldom describe emotions as such, and how you portray them in numerous metaphorical ways instead. It makes the poem more challenging but also more interesting to read. I like this piece.

    Good of you to replace your individual threads with one larger one. Helps keep things tidy, I guess.
     
  4. KatDoesThings Chaser

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sydney
    809
    Thankyou both for your lovely comments :)

    UPDATE!!!!!!


    The Text:
    My only friend glowed
    Green symbols and your name
    The letters burned my eyes
    And bounced around my brain
    Crowded with questions
    Clouded with cautions
    I know all too well
    Your twisted, taunting game

    A quiet violence
    It sent a seismic wave
    My fingers, my arms, my nerves
    My aimless little veins
    Leading to hollow
    Seeking to borrow
    Never to return
    ‘Its’ torn, tattered remains

    Only a handprint
    Pink refuses healing
    Prominent guilt reminds me
    My cheek should not have feeling
    Painted guilt with force
    Tainted with remorse
    A falsely accused
    Tempestuous twit, stealing

    Cavity had a cause
    A chest without a Beat
    A Boom
    A Break
    An Ache
    Lucky, demons can cheat
    Rhythm out of time
    Stanza out of rhyme
    Torture a heatless
    Until declared defeat

    A virtual code
    Hides an apology?
    Your regretful words
    Sign your psychology
    Demonic dream’s end
    I’ve changed into your friend
    Sudden change of heart
    Taught through technology

    Almost if instant
    The pain fades from my cheek
    And deep inside the hollow
    There’s a
    Beat
    Beat
    Beat.

     
  5. Technic☆Kitty User Is Inactive

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    Apr 2, 2010
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Indiana, USA
    1,298
    I have to say this is some of the best, if not the best, work i've seen on this site. The way you word your poems and the way you set them up is breathtaking to say the least. There is no bad criticism I can even give you. To say without any better way, you blew my mind. I don't know if i've read any of your work before and simply overlooked it, but you are definitely a lyrical genius.
     
  6. KatDoesThings Chaser

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sydney
    809
    UPDATE!!!!
    Both poems in this update are fairly cliche IMO, so I don't like them very much, but they are my work, so enjoy them anyway!!

    BREATHE
    [I wrote these lyrics a while ago, enjoy!]

    (Verse 1)
    It's like math
    One plus one equals no one
    Two halves and a setting sun
    A cliche romance that wont
    Exist with us

    Like a dream
    Reality is for thinkers
    Thoughts slipping through the fingers
    An optimistic dream that won't
    Exist with us

    (Pre-Chorus)
    Regardless
    I will find you in a crowd
    Amongst a silent chaos of sound
    I will find the words
    If they don't find me first
    But all I will do is

    (Chorus)
    Breathe
    The words never came
    There's nothing to say
    You're walking away
    'Cause you wont stay with

    Me.
    I wasted your time
    You said you don't mind
    You spoke to me
    But I'll respond when I can do more than
    Breathe.

    (Verse 2)
    It's like art
    Seven colours of the human heart
    Follow it back to the start
    A cliche romance that won't
    Exist with us

    Like a storm
    Lightning flashes and you change your thought
    Thunder rolls and I begin to talk
    An optimistic dream that wont
    Exist with us

    (Pre Chorus)
    (Chorus)


    FOR OLD TIME'S SAKE

    It was missing
    Supposedly degraded
    In a raging flame
    Of Selfishness
    And Greed
    And Apathy
    And however else you had defined me

    My chest’s abyss
    Its absence defined me then
    My self worth diffused
    Which satisfied
    Your Need
    And Desire
    To torture my remaining sanity

    The lightbulb sparked?
    Deep within your twisted mind
    It didn’t make sense
    When did that happen?
    And How?
    And Why?
    You really are delusional this time

    In this whole scene
    You were never to be blamed
    Nothing was yours
    It was my heart
    My fault
    My selfishness
    So naturally, I am the demon

    But then you said
    In amongst my confusion
    ‘You’re not a demon
    You are my friend
    So Breathe
    Exhale your stress
    So we can start again, for old time’s sake’
     
  7. KatDoesThings Chaser

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sydney
    809
    Hiya people!

    So I know I haven't been updating, and I'm very sorry. But I have a new poem! :)

    Is it a hurt?

    You watch a scene
    And glimpse a moment
    Accounting for your status
    Maybe the reasons aren't clear
    Yet
    But you can still feel it

    It was a look
    That reminded you
    Of the unforgivable
    A shriveled heart thrown to waste
    Yes
    No illusions this time

    Your stupid mind
    It pulled the trigger
    Sent an abundance of pain
    Through your soul, back to your chest
    How
    Does that make any sense?

    But is it a hurt?
    Or a pain of joy?
    Is it a sink?
    Or a jolt in the void?

    Then there was a kiss
    And the flashbacks flooded
    And your confidence frayed

    As did your ego
    As did your conscience
    As I was on the other line
    Vodka-soaked tears
    Revitalised my fears
    And in that instant I knew

    It wasn't your hurt
    It wasn't your pain
    It wasn't an act
    Of your memory-ridden brain
    It was a reminder of your mistake
    That only another fool could make

    And when that time comes, I'll feel sorry for him
     
  8. Technic☆Kitty User Is Inactive

    Joined:
    Apr 2, 2010
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Indiana, USA
    1,298
    As always your work is amazing ^_^ I almost burst into tears while reading this. You let the emotions show through, soaking into the readers. And I loved the first three verses, the parts where you would just use one word, it gave it an elegant touch. Of course I loved the whole thing, I could read it again and again and still feel the same ^_^ loved it as always, anticipating the next.
     
  9. KatDoesThings Chaser

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sydney
    809
    Hey all! I wrote a new song!

    GREY

    I only see my world in black and white
    The present is a curse in my twisted little mind
    Everything I see is grey, apart from your blue eyes
    Is that because you're still alive?

    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I love my world in shades of grey

    I like nostalgia, and the games it plays
    I like the memories, they toy with my brain
    I love my world when its all grey

    Too much colour then something's not right
    One more colour and I'll be blinded by light
    Everything I see is grey, apart from your blue eyes
    Is that because you're still alive?

    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I love my world in shades of grey

    I like nostalgia, and the games it plays
    I like the memories, they toy with my brain
    I love my world when its all grey

    You're a fragment that I kept in my mind
    I really am delusional this time
    You're a fragment in this little grey world of mine

    You're a fragment of hope in my day
    You're a part that will never go away
    You're a fragment of colour in my grey

    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I like nostalgia, I don't like today
    I love my world in shades of grey

    I like nostalgia, and the games it plays
    I like the memories, they toy with my brain
    I love my world when its all grey
     
  10. KatDoesThings Chaser

    Joined:
    Mar 16, 2008
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sydney
    809
    MORE LYRICS

    False Hope
    V1:
    It's like being told
    Your favourite childhood hero doesn't exist
    And you realise no-one's here to save you
    But at heart
    I'm a kid, with my hopes and dreams, I'm optimistic
    Then you come
    And you ground me
    And it kills me
    But it frees me

    Chorus:
    'Cause I'll go to sleep
    And you won't be
    Waiting for me in my dreams
    And I'm letting go
    Of my false hope
    Even though it's all I know
    So let's stay friends
    It's all you expect
    Me to forget with no regrets
    So I'll let go
    Of my false hope
    But my false hope is all I know

    V2:
    It's like being told
    Everything you believed in was a lie
    And you realise there's no truth staring back at you
    It's so frightening
    To face the facts, things have changed, but you relax
    Because you've come
    To ground me
    To kill me
    But to free me

    Chorus:
    So I'll go to sleep
    And you won't be
    Waiting for me in my dreams
    And I'm letting go
    Of my false hope
    Even though it's all I know
    So let's stay friends
    It's all you expect
    Me to forget with no regrets
    So I'll let go
    Of my false hope
    But my false hope is all I know

    Bridge:
    Now we're all good
    It all makes sense
    What happens when
    One of us bends
    For a new one
    What will you do?
    Who will you lose?
    How will you get through?

    Chorus:
    So I'll go to sleep
    And you won't be
    Waiting for me in my dreams
    And I'm letting go
    Of my false hope
    Even though it's all I know
    So let's stay friends
    It's all you expect
    Me to forget with no regrets
    So I'll let go
    Of my false hope
    But my false hope is all I know