Word from the Triangle (corners are overrated)

Ramblings from the Mould

So I am thinking maybe I shouldn't get back into writing after all. Lately it is like everything I write is like something scraped out of the mould at the proverbial rock bottom.

Anyway, there was a point to this thread other than me being emo and blah. I will present to you in here the newest offerings from said mould.

Twisted Romance

Spoiler

Twisted Romance

Twisted romance how sweet you taste
The bittersweet salt of tears
And the tangled honey of tongues
Limbs wrapped
Bodies entwined
Breath of sighs hot on the skin
Fingertips resting lightly
Grip tightening
The rush of fire and the dance of flames
Race through the veins and run to the heart
Pulled together
Torn apart
Over and over
Crashing and falling
Twisting and dancing
The smell of flesh and the taste of skin
Connecting of the mind
Connecting of the body
Losing control letting go
Freedom calling
Losing grip on reality
Senses clouded and overwhelmed
Caught in a tidal wave
Thrown over the edge
Drowning, drowning
Coming up for air
Twisted romance how sweet you feel
How cruelly you take me over
To leave me breathless on the shores​

Something a lot shorter than the piece I just uploaded, so I think nobody can tl;dr this one.

Anyways, again not really loving it, but again I need the practice, crit and comments more than welcome, though please don't just go omguh it r gud/no gud because I will shoot you in the face.

Writer's Block

Spoiler

Writer's Block

Scrunched up paper floods the floor
A room littered with emotions
A room drowning in ideas
Inspiration fading as fast as the ink
Wash away the blue and black from your hands
Wash away the characters and distant lands
Erase the fairytales
Start over

Scribbles and scrawls
Adorn these walls
Sketches and quick notes
The pulse of your imagination
Growing and fading
Each idea breathing a spark
A spark that dies in a burst of glory

Fighting against the closing walls
No escape to the outside
A prisoner bound by the confines of a room
That exists within ourselves

Hit the walls start over
The bricks blocking the way forward
Outside through the window see
The possibilities are endless
Yet out of reach
Taunting and teasing they perch
On the glass
Press your face against it like a child
Concentrate concentrate

Scrunched up paper floods the floor
A room littered with emotions
A room drowning in ideas
Inspiration fading as fast as the ink

For a writer there is no worse prison
Than the prison of your mind
When bound by the stone and the chains
Of art out of grasp​

She Who Wanders

Spoiler

She Who Wanders

Whispered secrets
Beneath blackened skies
Unanswered questions
Show in her eyes
Twisted torment
Tangled by lies
A painful betrayal
An untimely demise
No rest for the wicked
As she wanders un-free
Caught up in hatred
And lost jealousy
Beware her gaze
Avoid her path
Pay no heed to her cries
Or you too will be trapped
Forever searching
Underneath blackened skies
For answers that don’t exist
And unfaithful lovers who have
Long since fled
For revenge and justice
Executed by your hand
To the living from the realm of the dead
​

Trick or Treat

Spoiler

Trick or Treat

Distracted by the sound
Of children running ‘round
Screaming in delight
On this Halloween night
Running from door to door
Hands held open asking for
Toffee apples and delicious treats
Sugary chocolates and candy sweets

Ding Dong Ding Dong
Hear the ringing of the bell
Welcome the little darlings into hell
Smile at their wide, open eyes
Frozen in fear and lost in surprise
As they see
The smile carved into place
On such a pretty, pretty face

Insides scooped clean
Flesh perfect, pristine
The pulpy mush
So sticky and lush
Smeared between my fingers
The satisfaction lingers
As I toss away the seeds
Out amongst the weeds
In my garden

See their delighted smiles
They think it is all a trick
They don’t see the mess
So bloody, so thick
That covers the kitchen floor
A flood of flesh and gore
The stink of burning skin
From the candle placed within
The grinning head that overlooks the street
A dying breath of Trick or Treat

Now I just need to decide
What am I going to do?
With what is left of you​

 

Nice, how long did it take you to write it?

 

It took me about 5 minutes to write in all honesty, which is why it isn't as good as it could have been.

I used to be able to write poems straight from the air, I think I have got really rusty though :b

 

If you get rusty, start writing again :P

 

I agree, that is why I am starting to write a lot more again now. I desperately need the practice...as well as the crit and comments :b

 

As I've mentioned to you before, your poems are very strongly driven by feelings. This one, to me felt of a fast pace. I'm liking it. I've always thought your works strong and delivering, so it's no surprise that this one is of that nature too. I'm liking the simile in this.

 

Thank you, I am glad because the pace is something I had tried to aim for. I wasn't sure if I had pulled it off right or not but a few have said that now :3

Thanks for the comments, as I have said before, I have always been jealous of your ability with poems :b so it is a big compliment for me.

 

beautiful. It has a nice pace, and the descriptions you use are wonderful! ​

 

I absolutely ADORE poetry driven by passion, and the passion and urgency of romance is definitely present among the lines. I love how the emotions of love, lust, need and want are all there and working together. This is an excellent pice of work, Kay...Nothing less from you of course.

 

Why thank you love <3

Thank you, that means a lot to me. I am just worried that my own writing style is trapping me. It is like, I use my emotions so much in writing that I am finding it difficult to write something more controlled.

Thanks for the input guys, I am actually starting to grow fond of this one despite it being yet another reminder of the fact I have no sense of structure :l

 

Something new, written this morning, I feel like my creativity is draining into sap.

Spoiler

Writer's Block

Scrunched up paper floods the floor
A room littered with emotions
A room drowning in ideas
Inspiration fading as fast as the ink
Wash away the blue and black from your hands
Wash away the characters and distant lands
Erase the fairytales
Start over

Scribbles and scrawls
Adorn these walls
Sketches and quick notes
The pulse of your imagination
Growing and fading
Each idea breathing a spark
A spark that dies in a burst of glory

Fighting against the closing walls
No escape to the outside
A prisoner bound by the confines of a room
That exists within ourselves

Hit the walls start over
The bricks blocking the way forward
Outside through the window see
The possibilities are endless
Yet out of reach
Taunting and teasing they perch
On the glass
Press your face against it like a child
Concentrate concentrate

Scrunched up paper floods the floor
A room littered with emotions
A room drowning in ideas
Inspiration fading as fast as the ink

For a writer there is no worse prison
Than the prison of your mind
When bound by the stone and the chains
Of art out of grasp​

 

I liked this a lot; there was a lot of emotion in there, which leaves me guessing that you yourself have the dreaded block ;D

What did disappoint me was the ending to this poem - it didn't really seem to close it, and left it hanging in the air, if you understand what I mean.

Just a thought ;D

<3~

 

You have no idea ;~; I think it is more a case that the block has me.

I actually don't understand what you mean can you try explaining a bit more for me please? Or can you give me any hints on how I can achieve closure with it?

Also new, kinda like, kinda unsure of, but I am working on flow and structure, which is a whole new concept for me xD

Spoiler

She Who Wanders

Whispered secrets
Beneath blackened skies
Unanswered questions
Show in her eyes
Twisted torment
Tangled by lies
A painful betrayal
An untimely demise
No rest for the wicked
As she wanders un-free
Caught up in hatred
And lost jealousy
Beware her gaze
Avoid her path
Pay no heed to her cries
Or you too will be trapped
Forever searching
Underneath blackened skies
For answers that don’t exist
And unfaithful lovers who have
Long since fled
For revenge and justice
Executed by your hand
To the living from the realm of the dead​

 

...Way to make this hard for me...
Hmm.
I was thinking of maybe sudden closure? It's kinda like a cadence in music, and what you did was more imperfect than perfect.
...You don't play music, do you?

Well, if you could make it seem a little more finished than you already have, it would be better. I'm not saying that it isn't good already - you just have to work on the ending a little bit.

Hope I didn't fuck with your head too much <3

 

I'm not going to lie, that made zero sense to me. At all. I'll see what I can do.

D:

But thanks anyways for commenting.