Several Ways to Make Your Experience at Wal-Mart Much More Fun~

Discussion in 'The Spam Zone' started by Rissy, May 1, 2009.

  1. Rissy Queen of the Clouds

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    Put boxes of Poli-Dent in random shoppers' baskets.

    Move the displays into a maze, then stand at the end and congratulate anybody who makes it out.

    Hold a box tightly. if people look at you, clutch the box to your chest and say, "Mine."

    Hide inside the clothing racks, and when someone begins to look through the racks, stick your head out and say, "Do you mind?"

    Stand in the freezer with a sign that says "Do not thaw until 3000 A.D."

    Go to the checkout line and page yourself. Slip away, then come back 5 minutes later, saying you were paged. Repeat until you're told to leave.

    Stick price stickers to yourself and lay on the conveyer belt. When asked what you're doing, say, "I got hungry and ate all my food."

    Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.

    Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.

    Run up to an employee (preferably a male) while squeezing your legs together and practically yell at him "Where are your tampons?"

    Try on bras over top of your clothes.

    Make a trail of lemonade on the ground, leading to the restrooms.

    While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "I smell sex and candy"

    Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, "I think we've got a Code 3 in housewares," and see what happens.

    Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off with the volume controls set at full.

    Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.

    Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.

    Test the fishing rods and see what you can "catch" from the other aisles.

    Put a bottle of shampoo on layaway.

    Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.

    Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you'll only invite them in if they bring pillows from the Bed and Bath department.

    Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.

    Nonchalantly "test" the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.

    When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, "Why won't you people just leave me alone?"

    Look right into the security camera, and use it as a mirror while you pick your nose.

    Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.

    Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.

    While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

    Switch the men's and women's signs on the doors of the restrooms.

    Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from "Mission Impossible."

    Set up a "Valet Parking" sign in front of the store.

    In the auto department, practice your "Madonna" look with various funnels.

    Hide in the clothing racks and when people browse through, say things like "pick me!! pick me!!" and scare them into believing that the clothes are talking to them.

    When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, "No, no! It's those voices again!"

    Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.

    Get boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they don't realize it.

    Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don't get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.

    Go into the dressing room and yell real loud "Hey, we're out of toilet paper in here!"
     
  2. Rayku Kingdom Keeper

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    While walking around the store, sing in your loudest voice possible "I smell sex and candy" I must do it
     
  3. no-reality_allowed ¢ℓαιяνσуαηт ℓσνєкιℓℓ

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    I've done some of these. I think I'll do them again but this time bring a camera and record it.
     
  4. Luna Lovegood nani panda-kun

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    I've done a variation #4, and also the one with the bras, and the Wet Floor sign. =]
    My friend won in a fight for the last box of something (I forget what, a CD, I think) by yelling "RAAAAAPPPPEEEE!!!!" The other guy looked frightened and speedwalked away.
     
  5. kitty_has_claws246 Traverse Town Homebody

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    There's nothing that yelling "RAPE!" can't solve.
     
  6. Darkcloud Word of advice: Let the wookie win. He's Chuck N

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    Dress up as Batman, run to some random person, say 'Quck, Robin! To the batmobile!', and run off in some random direction at full speed.
     
  7. Rayku Kingdom Keeper

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    my friend has also did this, but it was in a amusement park on the batman ride xD
     
  8. Absol Hollow Bastion Committee

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    Someday, I will do this.
     
  9. Cleopatra King's Apprentice

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    Well we don't have Wal-mart here in aussieland, but we do have K-mart.
     
  10. Stardust Chaser

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    I remember reading a news article about some woman whose husband did a bunch of these while she was shopping and got them kicked out of Wal-mart permanently. XD