Riku's Girl

okay so you know how Sora is with Kairi and Roxas is with Namine right?
so what about Riku? i have asked myself this very question who's Riku's girl?
this will answer that very question.
DISCLAIMER!!!OKAY I DON'T OWN ANY OF THESE CHARACTERS IF I DID I WOULDN'T BE WRITING THIS!!! SECOND!! THIS HAS SOME SEXUAL REFERENCES AND STUFF SO IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT DON'T READ CUZ I WILL BE STONED TO DEATH!!!OKAY YOU PEOPLE GOT IT? GOOD! so if you don't mind that stuff please read! thanx!


Sora,Riku,and Roxas had planned a guys day out while the girls went to the spa.

"Riku, you really need to find yourself a girl." Sora commented

"Well, funny you mentioned it......"

"Are you saying you met a girl and didn't tell us about it?" Roxas said surprised

"Well i didn't want you guys to freak out."

"Never mind that how did you met her?"" Sora questioned

"Well I was at this club and I saw this girl she looked really lonely so I went over there and asked her if i could buy her a drink and she said okay. So we got to talking and she gave me her phone number and then-"
Sora interrupted "Have you called her yet? No, wait the real question is when can we meet her?"

"Let's see let me check ummmm.........never."

"What!" Roxas yelled

"I don't want you guys screwing it up like the last time."

"When have we even ruined one of your dates?" Sora asked

"Remember Sarah?!?!"

"Oh yeah i remember now," they said together.

"We really shouldn't have hired those stripers......."

"See that what I'm talking about!"

"Well that was a long time ago and we're way more mature now!"

"Well I'm still not quite convinced."

"Please Riku!!" Roxas yelled.

"I will think about...."

"Riku, there's nothing you have to think about you can trust us,"Sora replied.

"Alright I give, you can meet her."

"Yes!"

*roxas and sora high five*

"But on one condition....."

"Awwwwwwww....... we we were so close."Roxas remarked

"Sora you have to bring Kairi and Roxas you have to bring Namine."

"What! Why!! Your joking right!?"

"No, I'm not. This is the only way I know you two will stay in line."

"Alright we'll bring them," they both said sadly.

~At the spa~

"I wonder what the guys are doing," Kairi said while getting a massage.

"Who's know what they could be doing,"namine replied.

"You know how you and Roxas are going out and me and Sora are going out....."

"Yeah so..."

"Sometimes i wish Riku would find a girlfriend,"Kairi said.

"Yeah same here," namine was into her massage to much to find a full answer.

"Cuz i mean i love hanging out with you it's just that it seems like I'm talkin' with myself."

"Dido, do you know someone?"namine said questioned.

"Actually i do,"Kairi dug through her purse trying to find her phone book.

 

Writing Critique

Interesting plot, but...

-Punctuation: Kinda need to work on those periods and quotation marks.
-Capitalization: It's like every other line starts off with a lowercase letter. In the second line alone, Roxas and Riku's names weren't even capitalized.
-Spelling: You ran spell-check, right?
-Grammar: Six lines down, it's a run-on sentence that needs either needs some commas, periods or some conjunctions. And that's not the only line. It's like there are complete thoughts and sentences out there, but they seem jumbled and confusing.

Here's a tip: Check out the MLA website. Browse the Grammar and Mechanics section on the right-side toolbar. It'll most likely help you understand what I'm talking about.

Other than that, keep on writing! It's a great idea! ;)

 

sorry bout the grammar and stuff i usually try to save my grammar hat for book reports and stuff =P
but i will try to work on it
thanks for the great comments!!!
but before i go on with the next chapter who's do you think riku is going out with?

 

I think it outta be Rikku the girl for Riku the guy. It sounds cute and I think they would really bring out the other sides of each other

great start to that by the way

 

this one is a long one so be prepared to read!!


Chapter 2 "The meeting"

It was the night of the double dates. Sora, Kairi, Roxas, and Namine all carpooled. But they were running a bit late so they were 10 minutes late to the movie. But it was easy to spot Riku (he was the only one with bright silver hair.) But couldn't really see his date at all because it was a very dark movie house.

~2 hours later~

Once the movie was movie was over Roxas and Sora couldn't get out of there fast enough.But once they got out there they saw her. They were utterly shocked. It was Larxene!!!Sora couldn't believe it!Sora dragged Riku off and Roxas followed.

"Riku......have you got IN F***IN SANE!!!!

"What are you talking about Sora!"

"Can you not see!!!!" Sora yelled

"Why yes Sora i can see."

"THEN TELL ME WHY YOU DATING NUMBER XII OF ORGANIZATION XIII YOU IDIOT."

"Well she didn't tell me I swear!"

"Well do you remember the antennas!! Who could miss those suckers!If you stand too close to her she'll pop you eye out!"

Roxas chuckled

Riku yelled, " Roxas could you please shut up!"

"At least I'm not dating the organization girl!!"

~Back by the Girls~

"Kairi what are we going to do? I mean this is Larxene! What are we supposed to say? Who's eye have you popped out lately?"

"okay I'm going to say hi."

"Hi, I'm Kairi."

"I'm Namine, hi."

"I'm Lar-

Kairi and Namine looked at each other."We know who you are." They said together.

"You......................do?"

Larxene was caught off guard. What was she supposed to say?

"Ummm......................well I left the organization long ago so I really don't know."

Larxene thought that was a clever answer so she left it at that.

~back with the boys~

"WHY ARE YOU SEEING A GIRL WHO TRIED TO KILL ME!" Sora yelled.

"Sora, think you need to calm down."

"CALM I AM CALM!!Sora yelled. "okay you want me to be calm." Sora stopped slamming Riku into the wall.
"Okay I'm calm."

"Now Riku I have one question. Why her? No wait i have I have a better question. Why do you want me to die?!"

"Sora I swear she didn't tell me!"

"Oh really so you didn't notice the black coat at all?!"

"I thought it was just for comfort."

"You know what Mansex probably sent her to get close to you then kill me!"

"Don't you mean Xemnas?" Roxas questioned.

"Xemnas, Mansex it's the same guy."

Roxas just rolled his eyes

"Please Sora it's not like that! We still haven't finished our date let's just go to dinner."

"Alright but if she tries to kill me I'm killing back!"

"Okay deal."

 

Larxene and Riku? Excuse me for one moment. *Walks off and has a laughing fit* BWA-HAHAHAHAHA!!!
Okay, now thats out of my system...
This is so funny! "What are we meant to talk about, who's eyes have you poked out lately!?"
"WHY DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE!?"

 

thanks so much for the good comments! that really gives me good inspiration!
Since you guys are so hyper here's the next one!!!

Chapter 3

Well since it was actually Riku's and Larxene's date they picked the place.

"So did you call that girl yet?" Namine whispered to Kairi.

"Not yet but i found her number and I'll call once Sora and I get home," Kair whispered back.
Then they went back to their dates.

They were seated next to bar which Sora was thankful for. He went to get a shot. But when he took it and looked up he spit it out all over the nearby table.

"I'm so sorry please forgive me!" he said. He then ran back to his table. He once again dragged Riku off.

"Riku it's a trap!"

"Sora what on Ear-"

Sora interrupted "Just look over there dimwad! Sora pointed.

There they were the whole 11 members left in Organization XIII.

Mansex er...... Xemnas trying to retain some kind of order.
Xigbar close to passing out (lost to Luxford in drinking poker.)
Xaldin not saying anything.
Vexen poisoning someone's drink.
Lexaues not saying anything.
Zexion cutting himself.
Saix eating out of a dog bowl!
Axel heating up his tea.
Demyx patting Saix on the head.
Luxford dealing out cards.
Marly jumping around throwing flowers everywhere.

Sora watched in complete shock.Then Roxas saw what they were looking at and ran over to them.
"What are we going to do?"

"Okay I have a plan this is what we are going to do......," Sora said.

~Back by the girls~

"What are you are the boys doing?" Larxene asked Kairi.

Kairi and Namine looked at each other.
"Half the time we don't even know."
Then they both took a big swig of their margarita's.

FIN (for now) duhh duhhh duhhhhh

Hope you enjoyed sorry that it wasn't that long.The next will be out soon and longer.
Please excuse grammar mistakes and stuff. Thanks for reading!

 

i would but i've already got the next chapters done
but thanks for the suggestion though!!^^

I have nothing better to do so here's the next chapter enjoy!^^

Chapter 4 "The plan"

Once the guys worked out the plan they sat back down at their table.
The waiter soon came and got their order.
Kairi got the cucumber soup.
Sora got the lasagna.
Riku ordered the shrimp scampi.
Larxene ordered the Chicken Parmesan.
Roxas then ordered a Cesar Salad.
"Why are you getting a salad?" asked Riku.

"Cesar Salad is good!Plus i like to save room for desert." Roxas said

Sora and Riku just rolled their eyes.
Namine ordered the Steak with King crabs legs....

No one said anything.

"So......",Roxas started,"How do you two meet?"

"Well funny story I had was broken up with my previous boyfriend Zex-"
When see looked up she saw the whole organization. She just got up and ran for the bathroom.Kairi ran after her.Namine stayed though.

The guys looked at her.
"Well?" Sora said.

"I don't want my food to get cold!"

5 seconds later the waiter had the food ready.
10 seconds later half of Namine's food was gone.Roxas was still on his first bite. Then about 5 minutes later Kairi and Larxene came out of the bathroom.
"We got a plan."
After 5 minutes of explaining everything to the boys they finally got it.

"That's way better than our plan," Sora said relieved.

"What was your plan?" Kairi asked.

"We were just going to drink until we get drunk if things start to go wrong."

"That doesn't make any sense what so ever," Larxene said. The boys just shrugged.

"Anyways, so on one................two..................THREE!!
All at the same time Sora, Kairi, Roxas, Riku, and Larxene threw the food on their forks.Right after they quickly acted normal. The organization just looked around.

FIN for now

 

i thought that would be funny

Yeah only the guys could come up with something like that

well did you read the whole thing?

 

All righty then here's the next chapter.

Chapter 5 "The fight" duhhh duhhh duhhhhhhhhhh

When Xenmas looked around he saw Sora across the room giggling. Xenmas took some of his food and threw it and hit Sora right in the face. Then it was on.
5 seconds later a huge food fight was on.Back and forth the Organization and The 6 (Namine decided to join in.) Finally after 10 minutes of hitting each other with tons of food, the manager finally stopped it and asked both parties to leave. Sora,Kairi,Roxas, Namine,Riku and Larxene walked out quickly and quietly.Once they were out there was an awkward silence.

Roxas broke it,"Wasn't that a crazy date?"

"Tell me about it!"Larxene said

Once Kairi and Sora got home she got the girl's phone number.

"Hi this is Kairi! Listen I have a favor to ask........."



Sorry that its really short I wanted to keep a little suspence to the storyline.And if you didn't get the name of the chapter "the fight" i meant the food fight. I might have the next one out today though.

 

Keep it coming.... the suspense is getting bigger and I can't wait. I should right now look for a good dramatic music for this story.

 

Here, try this: http://youtube.com/watch?v=bWp9bfTCUCU

Ignore the people shouting and listen. It's kinda too dramatic so bear with it and I think it won't match the story. i can't find any other songs than this one

 

this isn't the last part but still a part of it.

Chapter 6 "The girl meeting"

~The next day~

"Soooooo.........what happened with Larxene and you after?" Roxas asked.

"Yeah like did you well............ya know!" Sora said.

"NO! You guys are sick!"

"Well then what did happen?" Sora asked.

"Well we got to her place we were at her door step and....."

"AND AND!!" Roxas yelled.

"She leaned in and kissed me."

" I bet that was weird...."Sora said.

"No it actually wasn't.It was like a light kiss."

"Please don't get mouchy on us!"Roxas yelled.

"Well that's what happened."

"So when is your next date?" Sora asked.

"I don't know.I guess I'll have to call her."

"Dude! That's the worst thing you can do!" Sora yelled.

"What are you talking about?!"

"Do you wanna come off needy?"Sora asked.

"Well no."

"Exactly so wait a day or two and if she doesn't call by then you call."Roxas said.

"Are you sure about that?"

"110 percent! sure!"Sora yelled.With a thumbs up.

"Alright then if you say so."

~With Kairi and Namine~

"So did you call that girl?" Namine asked Kairi.

"I did but she said she had a job interview so she couldn't come down till next week."

"Oh. So what did you think about Larxene?"

"She's nice which is weird considering she was part of Organization 13. I just don't think she's right for Riku."

"Yeah I feel the same."

"What did she say when she ran into the bathroom?"Namine asked.

"Just some bull about Zexion and how they were in a serious relationship and he dumped her to be with Lexaeus."

"Well that must suck,"Namine commented.

"Well that's what happens when yoai fangirls know how to draw."

Namine shruged,"That's true."

"Hopefully this girl will be right for him."

DUHHH DUHHH DUHHHHHHHHHH
tomorrow i will post the next one!

 

very very disturbing......

it makes me wanna scream a little.

Okay next chapter you guys you ready???sorry that it's kinda turning into a Soap Opera.

Chapter 7 "The Second Girl"

~One week later~

"Okay so what your saying is you don't like Larxene so you called this other girl to meet Riku. But Riku doesn't know that.That's why you had me call him and say that's theres a new movie I want to see. But your going to have this girl accidentally run into him and she's going to introduce herself then ask if he wants to grab food and blah blah blah???" Sora asked.

"Why yes excatly,"Kairi said cooly.

"Why did I agree to this again?"

"Because you love me!"

"O yeah i forgot........"

"You know Larxene isn't right for him,"Kairi said.

"Well you know that reallt isn't your decision is it?" Sora said.

Kairi didn't pay any attention.

"Oh look there he is!"

Riku was looking around for Sora and the girl was on her cell. Suddenly a girl crashed right into him.It was all going according to plan except it wasn't the right girl........

once again..............DUHHD DUHHHD DUHHHHHHHHH
sorry it wasn't that long once again trying to keep some drama.

 

Uh-oh! Who could that girl be? Why is every plan these people make a failure? Although, now that I think about it, the boys earlier plan of getting drunk, PROBALY would've worked, knowing the strange world whick these people live in...

 

Woo!!
This story rocks, I <3 it!
>;3
Wonder who the girl is..
>.>
=DDD

 

I always figured Riku's girl would be Selphie...

 

you'll find out soon enough

all in du time

or so you think......*plays dramatic music*

 

I'm sooooooooo sorry guys! I had alot of stuff going on but here the next chapter!



Chapter 8
Riku was looking around for Sora."Where could he be?"Riku said to himself.
He wasn't looking where he was going.Then a girl on her cell phone looking through some papers wasn't looking where she was going.

WHAM!

They collided. Papers went flying everywhere. When Riku looked up he saw a beautiful girl.
The girl got up. Riku picked up some of the papers.

"So are you a writer?"Riku asked her.

"No actually I'm a editor."She replied.

"Really? That mast be an interesting profession,"Riku said.

"At times.But not really." They laughed.

Then Riku asked,"Would you mind getting a cup of coffee or something?"

"Ummmmm................that sounds great!Where do you wanna go?"She said.

"Well I know this really great place-"Riku said.That was all Kairi and Sora heard.The silence was very loud.

"Well that was unexpected,"Sora finally broke the silence.

"UNEXPECTED!! THAT'S ALL YOU CAN SAY!!"Kairi yelled.

"Well yeah.I mean I didn't except that to happen,"Sora said.

"I don't think anyone could have planned that,"Kairi said.

"Well you tried to!"Sora said.

Kairi grabbed Sora."Come on!We got to follow them!"

FIN (for now.........)

next chapter should be out soon!

 

Hmm... Who is the girl? *Thinks hard* Editor, editor... DAMM! I Don't know any editors... *Thinks very hard*
DAMM YOU BRAIN!!