...im just not sure anymore

im just not sure anymore, normally i wouldnt post this but its getting bad.
im not sure if im him or if he is me. im not really sure where to begin with my problem so ill start from the beggining.
at the beggining of summer i suffered from a major injury to my eye and i had to be put on a lot of medicine. for a while i was fine and once my meds ended strange things began to happen, i started hearing voices in my head all the time when no one was there, i would wake up sometimes in the middle of the night and be in different places, destruction always was close by. at first i thought it was lack of sleep and that when i did sleep it was just sleepwalking. but then the voice started to call itself by name, it called itself V. He didnt talk to me much at first but then it came more and more and eventually he carried out complete convos with me. i thought i was crazy and for a while i didnt tell anyone. once i did tell some one he told me that if i said anything more he would hurt me and everyone around me. soon i told more people as i was starting to worry, but then i started to wake up in the middle of the night and i wasnt able to conrtol my body, it was still moving and breaking things all through out the house I could see everything but i couldnt do anything to stop my body. When i told my parents what was happening they thought it was just a cry for attention and ignored it, but then it began to happen more frequent my night rampages. so i talked to them and they took me to see a docter and they put me on pills that were supposed to help me. of course they didnt because all docters are just ****ing crackpots. so around a week or two ago V never shut up he told me what to do, i was scared to sleep because he had complete control. and normally i would just let all of this fester but lately even when im awake he has been taking control forcefully, its not major but every now and then i lose control to parts of myself a finger or toe here or there, and now im not sure if he is me or if im him or if he exsists and i never did and stuff way too deep for me to handle. ive told people the meds arent working but no one believes me. so now im really depressed and he tells me to kill myself he tells me to let him have his turn and that i should just go to sleep forever. im worried, i mean really worried, im starting to listen to him more and more im just not sure how long im going to be able to hold on.

sorry to bother i just need this fixed and i mean now i dont want to hear the voices anymore.

 

Seems to me you -desperately- need to tell your parents flat out that you need -real- help and this is not a joke and to get you to doctors that will REALLY pay attention to you and not just give you pills but also some serious therapy. You could have either schizophrenia or MPD and schizophrenia is very serious. It's a brain damaging thing and not just a disorder. From what you describe to me it sounds like it leans more to schizophrenia and this can be helped but only with the right medications and treatments.

Please, do tell your parents and if they won't listen get some help by talking to someone who will, even if it's a school guidance counselor when you begin school again. This is -very- serious and you are right to be upset and all because you are not getting the attention you need for a dilemma that is plaguing you. If you feel like you are going to consider suicide too much, even call 911 if you have to because if this is that serious that you feel out of control, you want to get it resolved. Hopefully just explaining how serious this is to your parents and that the medications are doing nothing will resolve this and get you to get some real help.

Were you actually diagnosed with anything? You don't really mention that you were diagnosed with anything and I'm assuming with how you are talking, perhaps they just gave you anti-depressant medication and sent you on your way.

 

it was jus some snti-depressants, the perscription is up though.

thats the thing though no matter who i talk to no matter what i say they wont believe me. i cant wait until school because im not sure i can wait that long. i cant talk to the police because they would have me talk to my family. and i will not talk to a therapist because they only make things worse.

 

this sounds like a horror movie.

if this is true.

then you must fight back.

im not really sure how to go by this kind of ankward situation.

but , its best if youre with someone, firstly you should try to clear your head, and relax.

then , your friend and you should try and talk to this V .

maybe go to someplace calm, and get help.

and try asking them to replace your meds with something more natural.

natural supplements have no side effects.

EDIT:you will need theraphy , if this continues though , but you must atleast try to assume some sort of control , and fast because , as repliku mentioned you might be in danger

 

might.. be in danger....there is no might. its not the meds anymore. its me i know it im just crazy its just me i know it dammit. ive always felt different and now i see why haha im just crazy.

 

hmm........

assume control of yourself.

youre going to let a bottled up depression manifested trhough an alternate persona control you?

you MUST get help, seriously.

you need to relax and try to maintain calmness.

if you can do that then, you can focus yourself.

 

Actually you -need- to talk to a therapist..and well not just a therapist but an actual psychiatrist. Not just a counselor. You do need assistance but seem to be just being treated for depression, which is not what is wrong with you if you are hearing voices. You need to encourage your parents to send you to a new person and explain to that person that you are being told to commit suicide amongst other things and say that this is -very- serious. Do not just avoid the psychiatrists or there is no way to help you. You ran into a doctor that did not take you seriously which partially may be your parents' fault because he listened more to them and they did not take you so seriously.

Try to get them to send you to someone new and make it clear this is no joke.

 

It's true about one thing, whatever you have you can't be in this alone.
You need to find someone that will defianetly help you, tell your parents, doctor or whoever staright up 'I am not lying, nothing else is helping I NEED your help'
Also the more you do something, the more you keep your mind distracted the more likely V won't be around, play games, watch movies, tak to other people, just keep your mind working so much that V can't talk to you, do things you love or even hate, the distraction are a great thing.

And about the doctors, you either get a good one or a bad one, like Repliku said if this current doctor isn't helping find someone who will, there is always someone, don't stop looking.

It's gonna b a tough time trying to solve this. You need to make sure you don't give up it's much worse if you give up.