Depression

For those of you who have it, how do you deal with it?

Quite recently, I've learned that the forming of a caricature often helps to cope with it, as would any rationalization of an abstract concept like this. I just believe that "confronting" your depression is a fun, somewhat naive thought, since it's really just an downhill battle. How it helps people physically, I have no clue.

There are others who tend to express themselves freely, completely bereft of the fear backlash or desertion. I don't know how this little faction does it; it's kind of difficult to imagine outright statements -- things you feel almost solely comfortable with in your own head -- being said aloud. I mean, is that a thing? Are there really people who have the strength to say "I want to commit suicide," or "I feel useless?" Granted, it seems that they are "asking for attention" by the standards of many (unfortunately), but they have the conventional sense to have taking precautionary measure before inevitably offing themselves.

And finally, there are people with prescription meds. Personally, I envy those who can afford antidepressants. You can (please correct me if this is some fantastical misconception) pretty much whisk away all feelings of doubt, insecurity, hopelessness, bottled anger, and frustration with the jerk of your neck and the contraction of your esophagus. You might have some complimentary therapy, but what does that do for you?

Again, for anybody who experiences depression and is willing to share, I'd like to know how others are dealing with it, and probably hoping for pointers too, if you have any.

 

First of all, antidepressants are not a cure in and of themselves. If they work, they treat the physiological symptoms through which the condition manifests; if the condition can be ascribed to chemical imbalances within the brain, e.g., lack of serotonin, then SSRis or SNRIs may be effective in "correcting" this imbalance. But I find this is a simplistic view and thus misleading, particularly if the depression is long-term rather than short-term, or if the cause is rooted in environmental factors rather than definite chemical shortages. Furthermore, the usage thereof can entail undesirable side effects such as weight loss, decreased sex drive, insomnia, all of which are, coincidentally, symptoms of depression (my mother stopped taking antidepressants because they made her feel "like a zombie"). Additionally, prescription drugs may be effective for a period of time but then cease working...

I also want to note that depressive behaviour often coincides with other mental afflictions such as personality disorders, which aren't half as easy to "cure," the question then: how does one acquire a cure for their personality? Persons afflicted with long-term depression often feel as though they are the Depression, preexisting personality traits are wiped from the canvas. I don't have the time to write as detailed a response as I'd like, but I suppose I'll provide some personal experience/opinion before I leave this. I don't think I would benefit from prescription drugs. I don't know whether I have depression per se, nor what my formal diagnosis would be, but I am very "neurotic." By this I mean I often act like my eighty year old grandmother, insofar as she responds hypersensitively to weak stimuli (hyperventilating, sobbing, et cetera). Panic attacks that mirror stroke-like symptoms, etc., etc. Perhaps the tremors, lachrymation, etc., is curable, but the source of the anxiety remains whether I am sedated or not (and I suspect the condition is largely hereditary in nature). This is where the role of therapy ultimately comes in.

Whether or not individuals seek treatment is highly dependent on the society in which they live, the nonexistence of "depression" in Japan for example is not necessarily indicant of the happiness of the general individual but psychiatric standards by which the society assesses its clients. In my country psych wards are reserved for clinically "insane" individuals, and people do not seek help unless they are physically incapable of meeting society's demands. Hilariously, we're also the happiest. Apparently. I'm sure all those Roma children are very happy to be begging on the streets (I'm also sure they were omitted from the survey).

 

Speaking from a personal stand point, yes, there are ppl that say, "I am useless" and "I want to commit suicide." And when you hear it, it's an outcry. I have said these things and I have battled with depression for longer than I can remember. So, yeah, I definitely get that you would be like, "How does therapy help?" I have been there. And at the end of the day, it is up to u to decide to get help or not. Saying how you feel out loud is the first step to fighting it effectively. There was never a time in my life that I remembered not being depressed, so no, its not an easy thing to get out of feeling. I am not one for sugar-coding things, so I'll just tell you flat out that depression is a life-long battle. And it's not easy, but the individual has to have the will power to fight even when they feel like they can't go on. Fighting depression is a choice. So, in the end , it's all up to you.

And honetsly, medication isn't going to help that unless you have a chemical imbalance or a mental aliment that may be causing these downs.

 

How do I deal with it?
Well, it honestly depends on how bad it is for me. Sometimes I'll just lie in bed all day and escape reality with dreams. Other times I'll just lock myself away from everything (including friends) and just write out my feelings or put them in some form of art. I don't usually talk to people about my feelings; mostly because I tend to bottle things up until I have a big mental breakdown. I once went to a mental hospital because my depression was so bad but that place was awful at their job and didn't help me at all. It was literally a waste of time and money.

Antidepressants to me are a pain and a chore. They make me feel weak for relying on some type of drug to make me feel happy. I used to take them back in middle school and some of high school and eventually I just got tired of doing it and stopped. Then after a bit of bad mood swings and what was possibly some kind of withdrawal, I was fine.

In other words, antidepressants suck. Don't do them. My best advice for dealing with depression is doing something to help filter and vent feelings.

 

Depression isn't cured, it's only managed and when you understand that then you can begin the battle of surviving. Mine is very mild and is accompanied strongly with anxiety and panic attacks but I was quite recently on these drugs that made it so much worse. I shut myself in my room and just cried, I have never felt so alone or so useless and I wanted nothing more than to not exist. My mind could not be distracted or satisfied with mere cheery comedies, that was only a temporary solution, the laughter was replaced by tears afterwards. Of course, this was more a physiological thing as when I stopped taking them I cheered up a bit, I still get it and can have it quite strongly but I know others have it much much worse.

The problem is, I don't deal with it, it causes me many problems as I internalise it and hope it goes away, which is does but it'll manifest in other ways in my psych. I tend to go to sleep, that helps as i wake up feeling better but until I go to sleep, I try to watch and eat things that make me happy but that works less and less. The best cure I have currently found is company so I try to find someone who will come into my room just so I can talk with them.

Of course, I haven't had any therapy but I know it would help as it alters your distorted view of your self, your world and your future which is part of what depression is: a distorted outlook on life. We blame our failures on our own shortcomings while our successes are down to luck and if this is something you see yourself doing then trying to convince yourself that you actually are good at things can help quite a lot.

So, overall it's more an experiment until you find something that works for you but as long as you know that you have your dark days but they will pass, don't hide it as that'll make the strain worse, talk it through with someone you trust and then try to find an outlet. Also, if you manage to find what sets it off and what your thoughts are toward the origin then you can try to control and alter your ideas to stop your thought patterns from spiraling off into depression.

 

I don't have an actual voice on the subject -- sure I've felt moments of depression but I cannot honestly say if I have it or not -- but I do think that LittleKuriboh's new series of videos on YouTube are a great discussion on depression. It's helped me, personally, with getting through my anxieties. It's also really eye-opening to see the creator of a series I've loved for years opening up about depression.

Here's the first episode.