AHHHHHHH! I hate myself!!!

I feel like I am surrounded by two-faced people who really hate me and are planning to humiliate me! I don't know who i'm supposed to be anymore! I feel like a wannabe being with the people I sit with. I really don't think i have any friends other than the ones here. I feel unwanted wherever I go and very insecure. I'm crying as I'm typing this. Everything I do I feel stupid for doing it just because everyone puts me down. Everyone tells me to just be myself but what do you do when yourself is classified as the biggest weirdo ever???

help? :cold:

 

Hmmm. Might help to know if people know how old you are first. It helps to tell what kind of stuff ur goin through, believe it or not...

 

I agree with DeathSight.

I want to help you the best we can, okay?

I, believe it or not, am an EXTREMELY insecure person. I used to be all peppy and everyone loved me. I moved to West Virginia, and everyone treated me like crap. I got a sudden personality change, and when my dad got custody of me and I was brought back to New York, everyone saw how different I was. To be honest, I was more mature. Everyone at my school, seeing as my brother has asbergus and everyone thinks he's mental, now everyone thinks I am too. I'm really quiet in school now. It all sucks.

I want to help you, okay?​

 

Well, I'm 13. 2nd yr of high school- 8th grade. it doesn't seem like a big problem does it? but it hurts so much

 

You turn being the biggest weirdo into something to be proud of.

Being ordinary is dull as ****, be proud of who you are. Everyone has something about them that makes them different and that is why each person is unique. Lets face it, if we were all the same then the world would be rather boring.
Never put yourself down hun, the world is full of people who will do that easily enough for you, so you have to believe in yourself at least, otherwise who will?


Now on to the other issues, what exactly is making you feel like everyone is two faced? You go to school with two members from here don't you? Can you not hang with them?

Insecurity is a very common thing when we are growing up, your mind an your body are changing and suddenly there is talk about growing up and everyone is trying to find their place in the world. You aren't alone, and if nothing else, at least remember that (:

Is there something in particular making you feel so isolated lately? As in has something happened to spark all of this off?​

 

Okay, I quoted this because it's absolutely right. I felt like everyone hated several years ag, but I opened up and just became myself, and I now I have many friends that I can trust. And they actually like me for me. Sometimes just being yourself is the best thing.

 

1. Well, not really. Its complicated. Diamond Angel ditched me and Skyru, well, I can't really talk to him at school.

2. I don't know whether its the fact that I've been ditched or that I'm sitting with girls who have been b*tches since I started school. I don't know.

 

Exactly <3

Hmm why did DA do that? I thought the two of you were really close? I'm sorry to hear that. As for Skyru, why can't you talk to him at school?

When our friends ditch us it does make us feel insecure for a while after as we get over it. We wonder if it is something we ourselves did, and question what went wrong. It is a sad fact that the older we get the more common it is that friends just drift apart, it is all part of growing up. Though as friends drift away that is when you find your true friends who wont float off.

If you dislike the girls you are with now and know they are *****es, why do you sit with them?​

 

Ok, let me try to put this simply:
Skyru is not exactly the guy you'd expect a girl to talk to. If someone sees me and Skyru talking, he doesn't give a damn but it screws me up. No offence intended.

i sit with them because I have no choice. Basically, there are only 2 groups in the grade, one of them being DA and my other 'friend' and the other group being the b* tches. If I don't sit with them, I'm a loner!

 

Find our who are your real friends and hang around them but if everyone else who hates you, get away from them. Find a new group to sit by and try to make new friends. Ask your real friends for help also. Tell your friends how you feel and ask for their adivce.


Sorry...this is all that I got.​

 

Hmm ok, but I think if you feel like that about him then doesn't make you just as guilty of ditching people because they don't fit in to what you see as the "right image"? I will admit I have no spoken to Skyru so I don't know what he is like but I am confused as to what would be so wrong about being seen talking to him.

Ok who is the other "friend" that hangs out with DA? Have you tried talking to DA to find out why she ditched you? Maybe there is some other issue that needs to be resolved.

To be honest love, if I had a choice between a known group of *****es and being on my own, I would rather be on my own. Of course that is personal opinion but it can't exactly be very nice being around girls like that all the time. There is always a choice.​

 

There is also the question of, "Does he feel weird talking to me around his friends," see. I talk to him whenever I don't feel weird about it, like I'm intruding on his friends' conversations. There really is nothing wrong with HIM, just my school. I've just realised I've been the biggest jerk ever! *goes to apologize*

I know why they ditched me, they said no one liked me, I'm too depressed for their liking and they feel forced to sit with me! They never actually thought that I might be depressed because thy made me like that! THEY put me down!

As for that, I just need someone to sit with until I feel ok with myself. or I make new friends.

 

I think everyone goes through this "awkward" phase in life. You are simply at a poing where your old friends are taking interests in other things than your self. I know it's hard losing those old friends, but the time has come to make new ones and it's these adolecent bonds that tend end up being concrete. I still talk to most my Jr. high and HS friends yet I don't really talk to any of my elementry school friends with the exeption of two.

 

Well, it's probably just a phase. I went through the same thing. The best you can do is just wait it out until something comes along one day and smacks you into shape.

(Random thought that has nothing to do with anything) That's odd that the eighth grade and be in the second year of high school. I'm in my second and I'm in tenth.

 

13 eh?

Dam, that is some deep **** that u r in right now. Idk what to say, but if ur really in that kind of situation, then unless u get new friends, maybe you should consider moving.....

Listen to a lot of the other people's suggestions though, but I have dealt with mean girls b4. I know how far they tend to take things. I mean, christ, I'm a guy, and they really did some f'ed up **** to me...... of course, that wasn't something that a very short law suit didn't fix >: )

 

Hmph, everyone goes through this. Be proud of who you are and don't let these other jerks push you around like a puppet. My parents and I had the exact same conversation. Sometimes people have their ways that make you feel weird because of all the friends they have and you are new to a situation. I understand, but saying you hate yourself is taking this too far. Keep it positive, because if they see that you are being like this, they'll target you. Show them who you really are and make sure it gets into their heads. I suggest showing it through your results in school, or just try making a lot of other friends, so they will at least leave you alone. When I was in this similar situation, I did what I explained and they left me alone, in fact, they have started to become my friends more or less. I don't talk to them too much though, because they may end up lashing out at you again.

That's my advice. =)

 

I went through the same thing a while ago. I know that it's miserable and lonely, but just try to wander around to different groups and hopefully you'll find one that lets you be yourself. Maybe look for people in a different grade if you can, even if the age is different, awesome friends can be found in unexpected places.

 

See what I mean? I think you are going to be just fine.

 

Hey, don't worry. If you wanna talk to me, don't worry. You can walk by discretely and give some sort of signal, I can slip out a conversation very easily and if the guys ask, we were talking about Kingdom Hearts. That is what they assume too, considering that they all think that female gamers keep it discrete.
Or if you do want to talk to me directly around my friends, then don't worry about it, go for it. It doesn't bother me or make me feel awkward at all.

Also, about the B**** problem, I'll make sure to tell you everything they say about you behind your back. IF they do, seriously, I blend into the background quite well if I want to. *thumbsup*

 

Change the scenario, if you can, so then you meet new people. Usually it is good to change your scenario/environment if you feel bad