Spoiler I was searching through my old documents on one of my old computers one day when I came across something quite surprising. I came across a story that I wrote when I was eight years old. Keep in mind I was eight years old when I wrote this. An ominous feeling is in the air, trees are tapping the window, howling wind is heard, foot steps are heard, and a figure is seen in the distance. Voices were heard in the distance, and that would be the cue to run. Instead I opened my spell book, and began reciting the spell to turn me into a mermaid. Since the spell required that it be recited in water, I jumped in the river. The spell also required that I hold something, and keep it either on me or with me at all times. Well I was in luck, because I'm always wearing my earrings. So, I took them out of my ears, and put them in my hand. Next, I recited the spell. Insouciant Inelegancy, Redoubtable mediocrity Refutable humanity Make me what I wish to be A mermaid… Witches one and witches all Give this power to me As I grew my tail, I dove lower in the water so that I wouldn't be seen by humans. I put my head band low enough to hide my elfish ears, and dove under the water. I hadn't grown my gills yet, so after my lungs were filled with a cup of water, I came up for air. That's when my gills grew on my face. Now I grew the other half of my tail. I dove under the water, and swam away. When I went to the surface to look at my location, I was at the beach. It would've been great, but it was a human beach. So I went back into the water, and swam some more until I found other mermaids. I couldn't speak their language so I recited the following spell. This world is full of different languages that I don't understand. This world is full of languages I cannot read. Give me the power to speak that language, to write in that language, and read in that language. Now I swim over to the other mermaids, and ask them a question." Where am I?" I asked. The mermaids just stared at me and swam off. Now to an Elfin that is considered very rude, so I chased her. Once I caught up to her, I grabbed her hair. "Let-Go-Of-My-Hair!" the mermaid snapped. I then grabbed her tail, and pushed her down to the ground as I swam down to the bottom of the ocean, where there is no sunlight. "How dare you swim off when I asked you a question! Were you raised in a barn yard?" I asked her. "I knew you weren't a real mermaid! You're an elfin, and you used a spell to become a mermaid! If I break the spell you will go back to being an Elfin, and you will drown here!" the mermaid said. "What? No!" I screamed, as I quickly swam up to the middle of the ocean. The mermaid then swam up there, and she grabbed me. "LET-ME-GO!" I screamed, struggling to get free. The spell is going to wear off in five minutes, and from there all I have to do is a cup of water in my lungs and I'm dead. "Why won't you let me go? I'm just looking for something I've lost!" I said to the mermaid. My tail then began to slowly fade away; it was only a matter of seconds before- "What are you looking for? Maybe I can help." The mermaid asked. I found myself running out of air, so I kicked the mermaid gasping for air. The mermaid then threw me to the surface. After I caught my breath I put my head under the water. "I'm looking for a necklace with a heart attached to it!" I screamed to the mermaid. I then felt a cold hand touch me, and I kicked that person hard, sending him [or her] flying. That person was a scuba diver, and I didn't know that. When the mermaid came back up, she handed me my necklace, and swam back down. I knew I had to use the spell again so that I don't get shot, so I got into the water, and recited the spell again. Insouciant Inelegancy, Redoubtable mediocrity Refutable humanity Make me what I wish to be A mermaid… Witches one and witches all Give this power to me I was already under the water so my tail was safe in the water. I still had to hold my breath while the change was happing, and soon I grew gills. I ex-haled, and swam to the Atlantic Ocean. Once I was there a mermaid pulled me down to the ocean floor. I have four minutes left before I have to have air. The mermaid pinned me down, and wouldn't let go. I now only have three minutes left. "What are you doing?" I screamed. She grinned as she knew I only had two minutes before I had to breathe. "LET-ME-GO!" I screamed. She still didn't let go, and I only had one minute left before I have to breathe. "Please let me go!" I begged. I now only have thirty seconds before I have to breathe. I was going to die right here. "Oh I don't think so outsider." She growled. "LET-ME-GO-I-CAN'T-BREATHE!" I screamed. By the time she had let me go, I had already drowned.
not bad for an eight year old. very morbid. when you said 'A Magical Adventure' i was thinking you would get out alive, as most adventure protagonists do. you never explained why there was a time limit on the spell and you never explained how you lost your necklace. im surprised that you new such advanced words that young. i wont comment on grammar, partly because eight year olds dont care much about such things, and partly because there were no errors that i could see. now that i think about it, you also didnt explain why the mermaid killed you. sure, youre Elfin (which you also didnt explain... and you spelled it wrong. its Elven), but is that any reason to kill you? anyways, the summary is: very good (surprisingly so for an eight year olds work), shockingly morbid, and lots of gaps.
Thank you. I really don't remember why I wrote the plot like I did, but I am glad I found it sense it brings back a lot of memories.
