Not bad, could be better. Necks too thick and shoulders are not quite right for the perspective.
I've always liked the the idea you have here and I think you're going in a good direction. But I still think you need some work on this, just some editing for grammar and awkward phrasing. The thing I happened to notice most was that it's backpack, not bagpack and you forgot to mention when Damian first picked up the apple that he ate at the end. Well, yeah, I think that's a good compendium of your errors. Just try to fix the grammar, spelling, and general technical things like phrasing things so they sound fluid and connected and you'll have a good thing going here.
Red is me. Sorry for the sarcasm, but I needed something to keep me entertained while I was thinking about constructively criticising your work. I missed or just skipped a lot of stuff if I'd already mentioned it. I don't know what to think of this honestly, it's got good points and bad points, but I'm not going to point out the former. Well, either way you need a lot more practice and a lot more quality reading for reference and experience; young adult fiction does not count. Okay, don't hate me, I'm only trying to help.
Just so you know, the generally accepted plural of shinai is also shinai when translating to english, like moose is moose either way. Also, kendo is not really equivalent to samurai arts, it's way watered down and standardized into a sport like what the Europeans did to fencing. Nit picking over. It's alright I guess. The neck is really thick, the head is a bit smal and the arms don't seem quite properly proportioned. The hakama pant things are also a bit iffy looking but it's not bad.
Nice concept. I don't think it's really that great or anything but I think it's a good early design that you can easily improve upon. There are obviously flaws but this seems less of a finished product than just a proof of concept sketch in its nature.
Pretty decent. I won't venture to say it's incredible or anything but I like it. The only thing I've gotta give the not so awesome stamp is the top one where I don't like the way the hair falls and the expression. The hair seems slightly off, not wrong, just not quite spot on. The expression seems pained, I'm not sure if that's intentional or not but it really looks kinda odd to me. But like I said I really like this overall.
My guess is better than your guess.
Noit'snot.
Whynoit'sstillnot.
Noitisn't.
Shit, she's right. I make it up to you with sexual favors?
No,Iwon't.
We've only just finished saying hello.
No, now get out of the secret base.
Developing the art of silent killing.
Kill it with fire!
If I'd known you were coming, I would have made extra.
You have fecal matter on your forehead.
