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  1. Jiku Neon
    If it's not boring my job is done correctly.

    Maybe it's writer's block maybe it's time to start thinking of another story. I run out of ideas after a while on every plot I think of and there's a little space from the place where I run out of ideas till the end it's rather annoying.

    I am at that, and I'm surprised you're still going to go through the agonizing task of finishing this.




    Door 18: The Train Job



    When the great beast of a machine moved it wasn’t with the slow lurch it’s gargantuan bulk would suggest. Nor was it with a slight bounce forwards of an automobile. One could tell the machine was moving when they felt their sense of gravity suddenly shift towards the back of the car and stay there. And one could tell they were at speed by both the return to normalcy and a muffled roar of wind against the walls of the machine, and the distant thunder of its wheels baring down on the heavy sands as the vehicle tore across the barren plain.

    Earlier Church and Callum had taken their places in the belly of the tank engine where a comfortably sized car rested. The lanky man and Daniels on the other hand set themselves down at where the front of a train would be solid iron the lock had an open air gallery of control knobs, switches, levers, dials and a number of other guidance controls arrayed in a half circle. The beanie capped man turned a few dials haphazardly and pressed his foot down on a pedal prompting the machine to blast forwards.

    “You guys alright back their?” Static crunched over the voice issuing from an antiquated loud speaker. Neither bothered to answer the question in favor of gripping their seats and suppressing screams. After a brief interval of silence the static crackling voice returned. “Cool then.” Several seconds later acceleration stopped and the two disgruntled passengers returned to their seats. Looking outside revealed the desert plains passing by in a blur of far displaced dunes and the odd shrub. In short, it was amazing. Callum tore his eyes away from the window and examined his surroundings more closely. Only there really was nothing to more closely examine; it was all fairly standard in the car.

    From the seats to the walls, everything looked almost as if it were from a real train, not a physics defying lock moving at speeds no train could ever hope to achieve. The boy looked to the front of the train; only a door to the front gallery lay there. In short this was all there was and all there would be for the ride. He sighed and closed his eyes, prepared to drift off into sleep as Church had done almost instantly. As his mind grew hazy he thought he could hear a voice calling out to him. A soft voice, a nice voice, a distant voice.

    “Daniels, been a while since you’ve come to the Lateral man.” The brown coated man nodded. “Whatcha even doin’ way out heresaways?”

    “Looking to find some answers.” Daniels sighed, not in irritation or any kind of anger, but more to keep himself from laughing at the irony.

    “Vagueness. Lots o’ vagueness.” The man replied turning another knob here and there.

    “It’s a pretty vague subject.”

    “Excellent, nice, and otherwise not my business. Schweet.”

    “Not speaking of vagueness. What happened these past ten years?”

    “Th’ Boss got killed on a job. His family and the route fell apart pretty much immediately afterswards. I think only his personality and strength could keep that kinda thing going so long. Well, long and short are: this one right here inherited the lock after his own son refused to take it and skipped town.” He said jabbing a finger at his nose and staring at it momentarily.

    “Short.” Daniels remarked with a scoff.

    “It’s only been ten years, not much can happen out here.” The lanky man replied placidly.

    “I guess I’ve grown a bit soft.” The brown coated man reflected.

    “Must be nice.”

    “It is sometimes.”

    “Huh, is that so?” The man asked almost sarcastically.

    “Is so.” Daniels replied with a warm smile.

    “Hold up a quick sec, bruh.” The man pushed his cap above his eyes and ears to listen.

    “What is it?” Daniels inquired tensely.

    “We’re being followed.” He said suddenly serious.

    “I thought nothing could keep up with the Rossetti original Locomotore.” Daniels’s expression was one of total disbelief.

    “I told you The Boss died on a job right? Popular trend in jacking called rocketing is to thank for that. You know how to drive this joint?” The man said quickly, biting his lip and narrowing his eyes. In the corner of his vision a dark spec was growing quickly.

    “I can ad lib it.” Daniels answered confidently.

    “Copasetic.” Without a further explanation the man leapt off to the side of the gallery and caught hold of a black object as it rocketed past the train. Two others had been grasping onto the rocket previously and the extra weight dragged it off course, up and away from the train. Daniels watched in anticipation as the missile bobbed and dipped in the air above the train. After a brief struggle for control of the rocket the three occupants of the vehicle were forced to bail as it came crashing to the earth. Two fell squarely on the train’s roof and the other into the desert. Daniels smiled and continued navigating the massive locomotive forwards.

    “Who the hell are you?” The two men that had landed on the roof were now facing each other in a deadlocked standoff. One was dressed in a once crisp looking red suit that was now covered in dust and wrinkling. He also wore a pair of sunglasses and his hair pulled back in a short ponytail, the other man wore a beanie and a confident grin.

    “Kun Yu Xin. At your service, mister highway robber.” He bowed in mockery.

    “Get the **** outta my way!” The man growled as he bared a blade lashed to the back of his left forearm.

    “Doubtful.” The man charged forwards only to be deftly sent to his back by a flowing takedown. Xin smiled. “Mister robber, you done yet?”

    “Fuck that.” The man came back with a series of quick slashes and a series of kicks to the legs. He was no amateur, but when he threw his right hand forwards extending a hidden spike it was hardly unpredicted. Again he was easily tossed to the ground. The man stood once again and ready for another rush, both hands primed for action.

    “Seriously dude, I’d stop it there.” The man only laughed. Xin narrowed his eyes suspiciously but said nothing more, he simply prepared for another attack.


    In the car Callum had been roused by the sounds of two impacts above him and Church either hadn’t heard or was pretending not to have. The next moment a muscular, solidly built man wearing dull brown mountaineer’s clothing and a face to match heaved himself through a window and examined the car’s occupants with a grin.

    “Easy.” Was all he said before he brandished a set of heavy clawed gauntlets connected by a long thin cord with heavy blades spaced about a foot away from each other hanging from it. He went first for Church who instantly opened his eyes and unlocked his scythe. The man was forced back by the broad guillotine blade it sported and Church grinned with that same bloodlust returning. Callum dashed out of the fighting area and brought his saw to the ready.

    “Forget it. We can’t have you going bat shit insane here, I’ll handle this guy.” Church said holding out an arm to bar the youth’s advance. He turned his attention to the grizzled man ahead of him. “Now your name?”

    “Unnecessary. We’ll all die eventually, what’s the point of wearing a label that’ll get torn off in the end?”

    “I suppose battle courtesy is unneeded here. Good to know I can go wild.” Church smiled sinisterly. He lurched forwards slicing the air wildly with his great pole arm. The muscular man adroitly guarded himself with his gauntlets till he was inches from the end of the train. The one final strike should have killed him but he used the bladed cord first as a shield then as a rope he trapped Church’s blade in one smooth block.

    “This place is a little small for me, how about you?” He grinned as he threw himself out the back door to the train dragging the womanish man along with him.

    Church thought he was dead for a moment. Then it dawned on him that he wasn’t. He was hanging on to his scythe wrapped in that cured man’s cords that were the only thing keeping them from anchored to the side of the train. The man had latched two blades to the floor of the car before he jumped and pulled himself to a sideways stand against the outer wall afterwards in hopes that his enemy would simply let go and die on impact with the ground. He frowned when Church made a likewise positioning change almost immediately.

    “You think that little tricks will take me out like that?” The man remained silent. It was clear that he with a ranged weapon with more than ten feet of free cord was at an advantage. But he still frowned because he felt the other set of eyes on him. He was still two to one and couldn’t take out the second target without compromising his position. Things weren’t going as smoothly as expected.


    Xin laughed heartily as the red suited man fell to the roof once more.
    “You’ve obviously done some ambidexterity training brah, but hell, that **** won’t do ya any good ‘gainst me. You’ll always favor one hand, no matter how well they both work and that tells me how you‘re gonna move.”

    “Bastard, never thought I’d have to use this on a simple train job, but it can’t be helped.” The man drew a pocket watch from his red jacket and held it out in front of him as a hypnotist would. “Enter, Devil Time.” Xin felt his body stiffen suddenly, then he realized it wasn’t just stiff, it wouldn’t move and what’s more nothing else seemed to be moving either. Even the train was moving at less than half it’s speed. So everything was moving slowly, not stopping. But then he saw it, the red suited man was moving just as slowly as everything else, this was Devil Time.

    An altered perception of time that makes everything seem to stand still. It’s enough to madden a man, incapable of moving but still being aware of everything around you, even the most calm would get restless. Xin blinked, it took ages. How long would this last? A minute? An hour? The thin man did not know, but he still focused on the target. No matter how far away the target is, it’s never out of reach and after all patience was a virtue. With time, the movements would come.


    “Up we go.” Church said smugly as he wrenched his scythe upwards pulling the man’s bladed cords taut as the long curved edge of the scythe hooked over the edge of the roof. The muscular man growled but followed along with the motion pulling along his anchor blades bringing the fight to the roof. The burly man’s jaw dropped when he saw the other two. Xin was standing over the red suited man with a broken watch in hand. He looked at the pair that had joined him. After a brief analysis of the situation he spoke.

    “You survived the fall? Dude.” The lanky man said with a smile.

    “Idiot should’ve let me take care of the fighting.” The clawed man snarled as his comrade slowly crawled over to him.

    “Whatever, this is tiring me out, I think I’d just end this now.” The lanky man said yawning.

    “What in hell?” Was all either of the two jackers had time to say.

    “Eat this.” Xin pulled down his hat and in one quick step launched himself over to where both of his opponents stood. He quickly extended an open palm just in front of the pair and with an explosion of light from his glove the two were blasted off the train into the desert as if by a great shockwave. “Done.”





    I honestly halfassed this one. I had the idea but I feel like I didn't execute it properly, but at this point I'm just unsure.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 31, 2008 in forum: Archives
  2. Jiku Neon
    Opiate of the People or Disc Read Error. For the brief time I was in a parody of a real band it was unnamed because of internal disputes on what it should be.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 31, 2008 in forum: Music
  3. Jiku Neon
    Post

    Light or L

    Does it really matter, none of the fuckers follow the rules.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  4. Jiku Neon
    I hope more people compete. That would be very nice.
    I don't think so. But I've been wrong before.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: Archives
  5. Jiku Neon
    Post

    E=Mc2

    Deadpan humor doesn't work online. I already got that just so you know.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  6. Jiku Neon
    Post

    Light or L

    TROOOOGDOOOOOOOOOOR!!!!! r
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  7. Jiku Neon
    Post

    E=Mc2

    Joules, not jewels.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  8. Jiku Neon
    I associate skepticism with thinking things out methodically and questioning established belief. Something I find quite worthy. It's not simply writing off everything everyone else says as false for those who'd like to think that.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  9. Jiku Neon
    Story of the month submission.
    Sunset Tonight
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: Social Groups (KH-Vids.Net Forum)
  10. Jiku Neon
    The night was silent, peacefully tranquil and utterly still. Save for the clattering of fingers on a cheap keyboard and muffled sounds of exorbitantly dramatic voices issuing from a pair of retro style headphones hanging around the neck of the insomniac typist. She groaned. It was the night before her term paper was due and the only thing that lay behind her was a long rambling essay on the significance of race on the development of children. She cocked her head to the side as a monochromatic samurai danced across her television screen. Ah, Kurosawa. She looked down at her keyboard for several seconds listening to the clang of swords travel from the plug in her television set out through the one good speaker her headphones provided.

    Her eyes followed the cord of her keyed instrument back to the desktop computer sitting directly behind her swivel chair. The girl pulled her legs up onto the chair and spun around to look at the screen, several red underlines marked where she’d mashed words together or left letters out of them. Several keystrokes later, all was well, as they could have been at the given moment. She ran a sore hand through her unkempt brown hair and sighed. It was a loss this time, three forty five in the morning was not the time to be finishing a paper due at noon. She made several alterations to the document saved it and reached over towards her printer to turn on the ancient machine.

    With a good deal of noise and several spells of silence later the bulky device showed itself ready with a green light adjacent to a power button. The girl grimaced once more and printed out what she had. It was B work if she was lucky, C work if she was realistic, and utter failure if her roommate didn’t die and fail to break the curve once again. But it didn’t matter, with a shot at a passing grade overall the girl didn’t dare complain. English, the illogical language, the illogical class. The point doesn’t have to be right to be correct. The sound of the samurai shouting in half muted voices ceased. The brown haired girl leaned backwards enough to glimpse the ending credits rolling by.

    Another sigh, her worrying cost the last few minutes of distraction she had. She tapped lightly on a remote control and watched the screen flicker into blackness she watched the computer‘s screen do the same a few clicks of her mouse later. A fresh grimace appeared of her face with the soft tapping at the door that could only have meant Keg had arrived. Originally named Craig, the sophomore who could down three times as much alcohol as a large Irish man gained his name through his ability to remain completely alert even after most would have passed out and pissed themselves. The brown haired girl grudgingly stood and opened the door for her roommate’s significant other throwing a dirty look at the groggy raven haired female behind her.

    The match was one made in eHarmony, two more different and yet still somehow mutually attracted parties could not be found outside the realm of electrical impulses. Still they were happy, despite his tendency to imbibe and her tendency towards paranoia. Perhaps it was good for them. He was broad shouldered but not intimidating built, tall but not looming in stature. His sandy head passed the girl’s brown one as he stooped under a hanging wire to enter the darkened room. The girl scowled once his back faced her, he would leave soon enough for a patient ear, but conversations amounting to “I love you†“Really? Me too!†held nothing but the prospect of triggering her gag reflex. So the brown haired girl grabbed her coat, slipped on a pair of shoes and made her way out into the lawn behind her dormitory complex.

    It would be dawn in an hour or so, maybe. Still the dim yellow lamps situated every hundred feet or so spotted the lawn in harsh artificial light. Another sigh, visible in the cold this time, this situation was somehow just as aggravating as listening to the two fools’ two stories up. With that thought just passing out of importance the girl turned her back on the lawn and returned to the second story passing Keg on the way and much to her pleasure and surprise ending up at a perfectly silent dorm room. The brown haired girl smiled internally and quietly entered the room, tossed her coat over her sleeping computer, slipped off her shoes and flopped into bed. Sleep came quickly, but left with equal swiftness.

    “Hey!†The voice sounded fuzzy and distant, while at the same time sharp and shrill to the dazed girl as she felt the hard light of the eastern sun on her face.

    “No…†She answered automatically. “You get it.â€

    “Quit dreaming, it’s time to go! Beate!†The brown haired girl only just stopped herself from shouting several expletives and violently attacking the speaker. She was awake and aware of the hideous pain in her head as well. Just when Beate was getting her bearings in the sharp contrast the light held to her darkened slumber a grin framed with flowing black hair appeared before the disgruntled girl’s face.

    “I’m up.†She groaned. Elizabeth Hong. Pretty, tall, curvaceous. Hatefully intelligent to boot. And she wasted it on journalism, the classless major. From dumpster diving, to undercover detective work, it was always one thing or another with this girl. All for a good story.

    “I can see that, you’ve got an hour till classes start, I thought I’d lend you a hand and make sure you were at least presentable--â€

    “Thanks.†She answered gruffly. The glare Beate gave must have been more spiteful than she’d even intended because Elizabeth backed off with a quickness to her stride. Whatever it was, the brown haired girl was grateful for the extra three feet of room to change into fresh clothing and pretend to fuss over her messy shoulder length hair. Did it matter in the slightest if it stuck out in several places, and didn’t have that ridiculous shine to it? Probably not for a student majoring in computer programming.

    If one works behind a computer all your life no one gives half a thought to who you are or what you are like physically or otherwise, that’s why she’d gotten into the field to begin with. As Beate stood musing over her life and future she suddenly remembered what she’d been doing five minutes previously. She shook herself of such trivial thoughts and reminded herself that after this year she’d never have to deal with English as anything more than a form of simple communication ever again. Ten minutes had slipped by, ten more to the building, ten more to pack, and half an hour to come up with enough carefully worded nonsense to get her through a class as she whistled a merry tune.

    Fifty five minutes and seven seconds later the brown haired girl pressed a palm to her head in agitation. Her essay was just out of her hands when she remembered something she had to change, but at this time the point was moot and could only be a source of annoyance and worry for the rest of her day. Brilliant. The rest of Beate’s day went by without even, a perfect situation to stress and lament over her mistakes. On her way back from her final class she saw a harried looking boy running towards her. She almost tried to evade him but watched him pass her without a word. Strange. Stranger still was the girl calling after him.

    His name was Adam it seemed, her name was either Stupid or Bitch from the way he responded. Beate considered for a moment what it might be about but against nosier judgment wrote it off as nothing but a lover’s quarrel or a bad break up or as something that was none of her business either way. So she walked on. By the time she reached her building the rays of the sun had become quite orange with their increasing slant with the sun’s progressive descent towards the western horizon. This time of day was worse than the middle of the night. It always gave the impression of emptiness, solitude, isolation. She shuddered in the wind. It was getting cold by this late in October usually, but the year it felt different somehow. The brown haired girl disregarded it and returned to her room, empty. But at the same time she could never keep away this nervous anxiety. She always felt as if she was being watched at that time of day.

    Elizabeth was probably out with Keg, or working on a story. That’s right. She had said she found a particularly interesting lead the other day, was it today she was going to be late? Either way Beate liked things best when she was alone. A press of a button prompted her computer screen to buzz to life, displaying a dark loading screen. She turned away from it, tapped a switch on her small television set and removed a tin from beneath her bed, opened it and scowled. Crumbs and Soaps. She replaced the lid and slid the tin back into place and reached for her remote control. Just as she did so her computer prompted her to log on and a scratching at the door prompted her to open it. She ignored the latter assuming it was some animal. But when it persisted the girl stood up and prepared to answer it. She’d expected a prematurely drunk frat boy who’d gotten lost enough to think he was a squirrel.

    A small dog greeted her instead. A tag that upon closer inspection read, “THIS CAT†and much to her surprise a flash drive with the two words, “READ ME†shoddily scratched into the casing hung from a ratty red collar. First, Beate contemplated closing the door then and there, the dog wasn’t hers and there was no way to contact any owner. But as she continued to eye the pathetic creature her curiosity about This Cat and the flash drive grew to a point where she couldn’t resist at least checking. So the dog was placed on Elizabeth’s bed, dirty paws marking the pristine white sheets, and the flash drive was set into her laptop.

    Beate smiled. If it was a prank or a virus at least it would be that foolish news girl Elizabeth to be the one to deal with it. The laptop booted up quickly and a window inquiring as to the fate of the flash drive’s contents appeared. There was only one file on it under the appellate CNK. Beate opened it without a second thought, a text based game from the looks of the DOS screen it pulled up upon opening.

    “Hello adventurer. Would you like to begin?†The type appeared on the screen.

    “No.†She typed back.

    “Are you sure you would like to quit?†Text in a semblance of a menu appeared.

    “Yes.†She selected.

    “7054629912.†With that the program ended. Beate was somewhat confused by the simple numbers without a sense of rhyme or reason to them, but it couldn’t be helped. The number flashed in her memory. How many digits were there? Against better judgment she flipped open her phone and dialed the number, it worked out perfectly. Her thumb hovered over the call button as she looked from the flash drive to the dog. It couldn’t hurt could it? She pressed the button. It rang. Once. Twice. Three times. Click.

    “Hello?†The voice was weak and on edge sounding even over the phone.

    “I’ve got your dog, This Cat, here, I think you may have--†Beate was interrupted abruptly when the voice came back. It was surely a male by the sound of it. A student? Possibly.

    “How’d you get this number?†He said tersely.

    “I thought that the drive on the collar may have been…†She trailed off and began listening to labored breathing on the other end of the line. “Are you okay?â€

    “I’m fine, look after the dog for a while thanks.†He hung up before the girl even had a chance to tell him she couldn‘t keep This Cat.

    “Bugger that.†She grumbled. The number had to have been someone’s and every number is on the nets it‘s just a matter of looking. A few more keystrokes. The number belonged a senior under the name of Isaac Mauprivez, eastern side of the campus. No picture available. The brown haired girl rubbed her chin in thought. “What harm could it do?â€

    Fifteen minutes later she had the small dog in her hands in front of the door to what she presumed was Isaac’s room. She freed one hand only just long enough to knock on the door. It opened to reveal a tall, thin, bespectacled student wearing shorts and a polo shirt over his pale skin.

    “How’d you find me here?†He was looking all around him and fiddling with a pen as he spoke.

    “Interwebs.†Beate said sarcastically.

    “You shouldn’t be here.†He stated bluntly.

    “Here’s your dog.†The brown haired girl answered ignoring his warnings.
    “You keep him, I’ve got--things to do.†He started tugging on his shirt and tapping his foot when he dropped the pen mid-sentence.

    “No pets rule in my dorm, not my problem.†She replied dryly. Her patience with this bumbling boy was wearing thin.

    “Take him somewhere else then.â€

    “What part of not my problem do you not get. If you don’t want people finding you then don’t leave you info with a dog.†She retorted holding up the small plastic device between her fingers. An instant later she noticed that what little color there was in the lanky youth’s face was gone.

    “You looked in that?†there was more wrong with him than just that too.

    “No duh. How else would I call your phone?†She stated rather than asked.

    “Go back to where you came from and--and stay there. It’s not good for you to have--ah just go.†With that he snatched the flash drive and slammed the door. Beate stood there for a few seconds trying to piece together what she’d heard, but none of it made any sort of sense. She knocked again and he shouted something incomprehensible. A sigh. This was way too much trouble for one dog. Not to mention that feeling, that ubiquitous set of eyes she could always feel on her back in the twilight hours.

    On her way back to her dorm she dropped This Cat off with a bewildered secretary in the campus center without a word of explanation. When she returned to her room the sun had nearly set and the door was standing ajar. A slight gasp. She had surely locked it when she left and Elizabeth would never just leave a door open like that with her paranoid personality. So cautiously Beat entered the room, the fading sun left it too dark to see much in the mess of a room and the light switch by the door hadn’t been working for a week. Still the girl persisted. A noise. The rustling sounds had surely come from Elizabeth’s bed. With a blind hand, Beate felt around silently until her fingers crawled their way around the neck of a cheap electric guitar. The sound came again, louder this time.

    “Who’s there?†Her sweat moistened hands gripped the instrument as if it were a club ready to strike.

    No reply. Suddenly a shape moved towards her with alarming speed and she felt her hands draw the heavy instrument down on it with a dissonant chord from the strings and a sickening crack from her target. Its form slumped over on her and a warm feeling spread from her chest to her legs as the body rested on her. Blood. As Beate staggered back under the sudden weight, she stumbled into a lamp. The light flipped on as it clattered to the ground flickering on and off sporadically. Now it was her turn to lose the color in her face.

    It was Isaac lying over her, dead. His face screwed up in a kind of pained grin. Beate shoved him off of her letting his blood pour from the jagged gash in his head his head all over her arms. That scent, it was sickening. As Beate turned, a flash of crimson caught her eye. In the far corner Beate saw another figure lying just as limp as the thin boy at her feet. Beate almost threw up when she realized it was her roommate Elizabeth. Her bloodied face and supine form only just visible in the last wisps of sunlight in the day. Then came total darkness. The lamp did not flicker on again; the sun did not shine any longer. No one was any longer watching. The brown haired girl dropped to her knees, distraught. She tried to wipe the sweat and tears from her face but only succeeded in smearing that vile blood over her face. But still no one watching.
    Thread by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008, 5 replies, in forum: Archives
  11. Jiku Neon
    You people give me way too much credit. I've got no chance of be better than anyone here.

    Okay, here's what I have. I'm not happy with it really but time runs low.

    October Submission
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 30, 2008 in forum: Archives
  12. Jiku Neon
  13. Jiku Neon
    I don't really like to be the nitpicker here but the Star Ocean series for the record is produced by Enix developed by Tri-Ace, one of my favorite developers of RPGs out there by the way. I only wish I had a working PSP even more with this coming out.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 29, 2008 in forum: Gaming
  14. Jiku Neon
    Kill them with fire.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 29, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  15. Jiku Neon
    I'm contesting. Mine should be up before midnight pacific time tomorrow.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 29, 2008 in forum: Archives
  16. Jiku Neon
    Where's he standing? It's kinda like he's floating in midair over the ground with only the toes of his shoes on the ground. If you're going to angle it be consistent. The right arm looks misshapen, like a birth defect or a horrendous accident. His upper body is too big and his legs are too short. No one is proportioned with llike that, well midgets, or little people, or whatever they call themselves are but he is not one of them. His face is flat and lacks dimension and his head is too long. It may look fine but these are all problem with the structure of your drawing.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 28, 2008 in forum: Arts & Graphics
  17. Jiku Neon
  18. Jiku Neon
    You've got a bunch of typos in here I'm pretty sure. It's overall pretty good, not my usual fare and not to my taste really but still is well written enough.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 27, 2008 in forum: Archives
  19. Jiku Neon
    Same thoughts.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 26, 2008 in forum: The Spam Zone
  20. Jiku Neon
    I'm sure I've told someone this before, but I hate coloring with a passion. I can't do it and I don't wanna. If I could do it on gimp or photoshop I would but those aren't options either really.
    Um... deal with it? It's a tradition for me. I can't just suddenly say that I think I'm somewhat competent, especially when I believe that relative to where I want to be I do in fact suck verily.
    Post by: Jiku Neon, Oct 26, 2008 in forum: Arts & Graphics