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Great more "research".

Spoiler

I was searching through my old documents on one of my old computers one day when I came across something quite surprising. I came across a story that I wrote when I was eight years old.
Keep in mind I was eight years old when I wrote this.

An ominous feeling is in the air, trees are tapping the window, howling wind is heard, foot steps are heard, and a figure is seen in the distance.

Voices were heard in the distance, and that would be the cue to run.

Instead I opened my spell book, and began reciting the spell to turn me into a mermaid. Since the spell required that it be recited in water, I jumped in the river. The spell also required that I hold something, and keep it either on me or with me at all times. Well I was in luck, because I'm always wearing my earrings. So, I took them out of my ears, and put them in my hand.

Next, I recited the spell.

Insouciant Inelegancy,

Redoubtable mediocrity

Refutable humanity

Make me what I wish to be

A mermaid…

Witches one and witches all

Give this power to me

As I grew my tail, I dove lower in the water so that I wouldn't be seen by humans. I put my head band low enough to hide my elfish ears, and dove under the water. I hadn't grown my gills yet, so after my lungs were filled with a cup of water, I came up for air.

That's when my gills grew on my face.

Now I grew the other half of my tail.

I dove under the water, and swam away.

When I went to the surface to look at my location, I was at the beach. It would've been great, but it was a human beach.

So I went back into the water, and swam some more until I found other mermaids. I couldn't speak their language so I recited the following spell.

This world is full of different languages that I don't understand. This world is full of languages I cannot read.

Give me the power to speak that language, to write in that language, and read in that language.

Now I swim over to the other mermaids, and ask them a question." Where am I?" I asked.

The mermaids just stared at me and swam off.

Now to an Elfin that is considered very rude, so I chased her.

Once I caught up to her, I grabbed her hair.

"Let-Go-Of-My-Hair!" the mermaid snapped.

I then grabbed her tail, and pushed her down to the ground as I swam down to the bottom of the ocean, where there is no sunlight.

"How dare you swim off when I asked you a question! Were you raised in a barn yard?" I asked her.

"I knew you weren't a real mermaid! You're an elfin, and you used a spell to become a mermaid! If I break the spell you will go back to being an Elfin, and you will drown here!" the mermaid said.

"What? No!" I screamed, as I quickly swam up to the middle of the ocean. The mermaid then swam up there, and she grabbed me. "LET-ME-GO!" I screamed, struggling to get free. The spell is going to wear off in five minutes, and from there all I have to do is a cup of water in my lungs and I'm dead.

"Why won't you let me go? I'm just looking for something I've lost!" I said to the mermaid.

My tail then began to slowly fade away; it was only a matter of seconds before-

"What are you looking for? Maybe I can help." The mermaid asked. I found myself running out of air, so I kicked the mermaid gasping for air. The mermaid then threw me to the surface. After I caught my breath I put my head under the water.

"I'm looking for a necklace with a heart attached to it!" I screamed to the mermaid. I then felt a cold hand touch me, and I kicked that person hard, sending him [or her] flying.

That person was a scuba diver, and I didn't know that.

When the mermaid came back up, she handed me my necklace, and swam back down. I knew I had to use the spell again so that I don't get shot, so I got into the water, and recited the spell again.

Insouciant Inelegancy,

Redoubtable mediocrity

Refutable humanity

Make me what I wish to be

A mermaid…

Witches one and witches all

Give this power to me

I was already under the water so my tail was safe in the water.

I still had to hold my breath while the change was happing, and soon I grew gills.

I ex-haled, and swam to the Atlantic Ocean.

Once I was there a mermaid pulled me down to the ocean floor.

I have four minutes left before I have to have air.

The mermaid pinned me down, and wouldn't let go.

I now only have three minutes left.

"What are you doing?" I screamed.

She grinned as she knew I only had two minutes before I had to breathe.

"LET-ME-GO!" I screamed.

She still didn't let go, and I only had one minute left before I have to breathe.

"Please let me go!" I begged.

I now only have thirty seconds before I have to breathe.

I was going to die right here.

"Oh I don't think so outsider." She growled.

"LET-ME-GO-I-CAN'T-BREATHE!" I screamed.

By the time she had let me go, I had already drowned.

[video=youtube;aP3gzee1cps]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aP3gzee1cps[/video]
Okay where are the cameras and microphones?