well....i've read thus far.....certainly not PG-13...but, its good read. i have a feeling this is going to get even darker....
that sounded way too deadly. but anyways, is it seriously your situation, because it doesn't sound good.
Well...this is a very interesting read. girl...you are now my rival!....just kidding, i just wish you could write a bit more. anyways it was good.
I must say this chapter was great.... and it made me laugh....question do you have any intention on expading how the world works in this story?
well...this is short....meh...but i'm one to talk anyways....i don't exactly understand what's happened at the beggining...will that be explained later?
well....one thing is certain she has kairi's appaerance...maybe due to sora, maybe due to kairi. but this special birth thing seems like an excuse to add new characters, by making a super-weird twist....heck special birth can lead to saying anything and if it sounds plausible then they add it. just like the lexicon...wich was added way latter, and was an on the moment creation.
welcoming a new member , eh? okay, welcome Erica..i'm sure you will make lots of friends quickly and remember not to spam unless in the spam zone. and have fun. oh and follow the rules.
Quoted for truth. religion and goverment should be two separate entities, through time we have seen what having the two mixed has brought and its not pretty.
Fate 2: Promised sanctuary *Richard* “Sanctuary……often a word used to describe a place of rest, or a place desirable….,now students….†The enthusiastic teacher kept speaking, out loud, as he slammed his hand on the desk each time as a sign of amusement. “There is nothing, I want more…†those could be my only thoughts as I slowly looked around, or distracted myself with things that were less important than class. Slam!!! The teacher amused once again hit the desk as he was so accustomed to do, but this time it wasn’t out of amusement, but done in a scolding manner. “Richard, maybe you could delve further into the word sanctuary", the teacher grinned, almost looking triumphant due to seeing me quiver in such an unprepared manner. “Sanctuary…well... Sanctuary may often be related to a place often dreamt of, or maybe a place that has been experienced in bliss†I grinned as I sat down with my eyes fixated on the teacher who was in every sense of the word OWNED. It’s not that I enjoyed humiliating my teachers in front of their whole class, well maybe a bit, but some teacher almost begged me to. Today was a day that was dragging on too long, it was a special day, but the special thing about it wasn’t exactly school related and thus I would have to wait until school activities were over. [XxX] “I’m not going! “ A stern look was the only thing I could get from the black haired youth, I called my friend. “Damian…you need to go!†I said looking for a better answer as I positioned myself to eat lunch. “I will not go and that’s final!†His face serious seemed to be all too decided on this matter, but I wasn’t going to settle for a no. “Try telling that to her†I said as I greeted the girl who positioned herself in a seat. The short and beautiful girl that had been our friend ever since I can remember “Maria!†Damian looked at her almost like he was caught between a rock and a hard place. “You’re screwed Damian, now you have no choice but to say yes†I grinned sheepishly as I looked at the now forced face my friend Damian had no other choice but to present. “We are going to see my brother today, right?†The young petit girl said as she accommodated her long black hair behind her. “You remember the place right?†“The word sanctuary was very akin to the place she talked about, it was only a little hill, but the memories it held were enough to deem it of such a title.†School hours passed by without occurrence as the clock signaled the end of another day. [XxX] “Damian comes on, Maria said she’s going to head on first†I said with an enthusiastic tone, which made me remember the anxiousness of a child. As we walked towards the vast union of trees, I could feel something wasn’t exactly right. “Damian…..†I was interrupted in my words, and I could barely keep a joyful face. “Hello†The thing I would not want to happen today, happened, as I looked into clear opposition in the eyes of this intruder. “Hello Faite†It seemed Damian enjoyed being around him, and I could only stand there, even when I tried to talk to this new person, it felt like my words drowned in something couldn’t describe. “Damian, we need to go†I said looking anywhere else but his face, avoiding any eye contact , I felt Faite could almost look into you, or at least I felt that way. To this he looked at me in a confused manner, I just pulled him away into the trees and to the location we were going. “What was that all about!?†Damian asked freeing himself from my grip. “Well, we need to hurry and….†“And what! You think you can just take me to wherever you want to go?†Damian spat angrily back at me. “Whatever, let’s just get this over with†He started taking the lead as he moved towards the forest; I didn’t even care to utter a word. “Maze…†The only words I could find to describe the next extension of our location, a burned down school that was left without any sort of ceiling, the crumbled brick walls had stacked up in a manner you would really think it was a maze. The small vines connected to each other formed beautiful decoration for this maze, almost had if someone had purposely made the vines to position themselves in that way. “In order to reach sanctuary thou must cross this maze†I remembered hearing those words from my grandmother, as she told me some sort of story about a maze, and at the end of the maze the heroes of the story would find a Goddess. It almost sounded like a fairytale…. We certainly knew the way to reach the end of this maze; we had gone through it so many times we had already grown accustomed to it. Damian and I couldn’t have been more silent, I wasn’t exactly sure how to start a conversation with him, and to me it seemed he saw me as nothing more than a bother, now that he seemed angry I didn’t think it was okay to talk to him. “After knowing all this,hould I really keep being his friend?†The imminent question pierced all of my thoughts. But more importantly was another question which made a tingle come up my spine. “Was I truly ready to enter sanctuary?â€
well , you can start by reading Fate(rebuild) and comment on the first chapter http://www.kh-vids.net/showthread.php?p=2182335#post2182335 Everyone help me out...i want critique....i had to scrap the other one due to a very hard writting style that would have crumbled on me eventually.
Fate: Unfinished saint. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Fate remains wholly inexorable†-Anonymous Fate 1: Harmless trap. *Damian* “RIIIINGGG!!!!†The disturbing sound of the alarm signaling the first day of school started its noise; And small rays of sunlight could be seen through the small openings in the curtains. As a new day began, I could hear the calm chirping of birds, and the smell of breakfast being cooked downstairs. “The first day of school†“Damian are you awake!?†I could hear the sound of my mother calling. "7:30" I was late. I quickly jumped out of my bed, moving myself toward the bathroom, which them was followed by a short visit to my closet, getting the first thing I could grab to wear, It didn’t matter that much after all. I moved trough the hall and down the stairs, only to be greeted by my cheery and upbeat family. I certainly acted very different from them, I was a black sheep in this family, but somehow they seemed to dismiss all that and treated me as if I was just like them, which in one way or another I was grateful for. I quickly grabbed my backpack, it was the first day of school after all, and I didn’t want to be late, and if I did make it in time I wouldn’t need to hide so much, because there would be commotion from freshman’s. “School, sanctuary of learning some might call it, to me it was nothing more than a brainwashing institution ruled by drama and social divisions which could only cause trouble.†I moved steadily through the cobblestone path, making enough distance between me and my house, it was just a few moments later that I spotted the school campus, how convenient it was to live in such a small town, school was just a few blocks away. The great and big school, the great building stood tall, it’s gray colors contrasting in the sunlight, separated from the sounds of the town, surrounded by trees that rocked gently in the wind, if there was something to like about it, it would have been that. Everyone was already entering the campus, and I could see everyone well dressed and showing off, looking at mirrors, Breaking in clothes, and chattering whatever it is we teens chatter about; It was always like this, the people would focus so much on superficial things, that they forgot the main reason to go to school. I grew sick and tired of watching this every year, I really couldn’t care less, but in the end I somehow ended devastated by the less-than important dilemmas, If something, I had much to complain about my life; For starters, I was greatly surprised with how stupid some people were; Having a constant routine over and over again was not something I enjoyed either; And I’m not sure how I put up with it. The school bell rang so I decided to make my way to the classroom, and I almost entered unnoticed, I was almost about to go into a state of tranquility. “Made it without incci-“My thought was cut off abruptly by a voice. “Hello, Damian†I made a forced stop, and that voice, that soft voice, that I could associate with annoyance could only belong to… “Hey, Richard†I said in a muffled tone. Richard torwell He’s the person who everyone wants to be friends with, except me, that is, he’s the perfect example of a teenager with lots of options, he could simply do whatever he wishes to do, and yet he doesn’t , now, I’m not sure why he still talks to me, he must Talk to me out of pity or something similar to it, I’m sure that he being with me must have ruined his reputation somehow. “Damian?†He said waving his hand in front of my face; I usually tend to think too much, which sometimes gets me spaced out As the teacher came in, I took a seat in the back, looking around inspecting each one of my classmates, everyone seemed excited enough to start another boring school year The teacher started giving class, but as always I wasn’t really listening, I always sat in the back and next to a window, if I wasn’t going to listen to the teacher , I might as well look at the scenery the trees surrounding the school had to offer. Classes slowly ended, one by one, it was almost torture having to go through introductions and the morning classes, horrible to say the least, but finally half of the day was over, and now I was to be thrown in a jungle. Lunch time A jungle, because it’s expansive, holds animals, and it’s such a bother not being able to eat with your group, they make you go through the trouble of looking for tables that are always divided by social divisions; Animals marking their turf. So I just looked for an empty table and sat as quickly and inavertedly as I could. “GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!!†the loud yell could be heard through the whole cafeteria. I had almost forgotten… “Rebecca Trasver “ The girl that stirred things up, I don’t really know her personally, but from the much disputes I’ve seen started by her, its not hard to figure out what kind of person she is. “MOVE!!!†-she pushed a girl on her way, as she flipped her golden hair, and looked in a small mirror that reflected a face that was heavy laden with cosmetics. The poor fallen girl spilled all her food over her, covering her dark hair completely and the rest of her food being splattered abruptly in the floor, she looked familiar somehow, but it was too far away to actually tell. I only gave a sigh and sat down on a table, in which Richard quickly sat too. “She sure hasn’t lost her touch†Richard said with a slight chuckle. “He was one to talk, I would probably classify him with her type of people if he wasn’t so nice to me.†I just kept eating, the cafeteria was very big, big enough for people to start dividing in different social groups as they ate, which to some might be a blessing. And I wondered why Richard seated next to me; he could easily move with the “popular†people, he was more than welcome. I felt compelled to ask him, but it didn’t seem to be important, so I decided to opt against it. As the day continued, I slowly made my way to a seat in the back, next to a window; The last class of the day had begun, and I started to look out the window, as I was so accustomed to , almost like a ritual, something essential to me now. “This will always be the same, and I better get used to it. We humans can’t change our fate, there are many things which….†My thought got interrupted as the director entered our classroom, and behind him, a person I had never seen before. And just like that the classroom started chattering, and whispering; probably making some sort of biased judgment to the person who was being presented. “Hello students, we would like you to meet your new classmate, his name is….†“Faite, Pantheon†the young man said in a very odd way of speaking, he was certainly different from any of us, his auburn colored hair was well cut, and his eyes looked like two emeralds , aside from that he was overly bland, his clothing didn’t seem at all that spectacular. I was a tad surprised, but quickly looked back outside the window, besides by the chatter everyone else was whispering I could tell they had far more interest in this new person than what I cared. As soon as the introductions were over, our class president quickly stood up, trying to leave some sort of impression as always. Class president, Francheska Milan. Francheska has been class president, ever since primary school, after all there was no one who strived for perfection as much as she did. Francheska always clashed with Rebecca, because of her perfectionist nature she always reprimanded Her; Not only that, but she always was scolding me, she said she didn’t like my attitude towards education. “What was her problem!?†she couldn’t have enough with controlling her life; she also had to control everyone else’s. She suffocated him with invitations to seat next to her. “Always trying to be the best….do you ever think about others†But as luck would have it, he sat next to me, and my curiosity was getting the better of me. So as soon as he sat down I started inspecting him, but only slightly, so he wouldn’t notice. I quickly spotted an apple. “How old-school to bring an apple to the teacher†I thought, but as the bell rang he never gave it. I quickly made my way back through the halls; I was like a shadow going through the campus, if it wasn’t for Richard, I would probably get away without gathering too much attention, that’s why I avoided being around him during free periods , he always attracted, too much unwanted people . So I made my way back home as I was so accustomed to do everyday of the school year; in this small town there was really no need for me to take any other type of transportation. “This new guy made things a bit different, but that doesn’t change the facts that, my life can never change†I thought as I made my way through the road. As I walked down the cobblestone path; I stopped as I saw a round shape on the floor. “An Apple?†I thought as I bent down to pick up a succulent looking apple. And as I stood up, I saw “Himâ€. “The new guy “Faite.†“Excuse me, I seem to have dropped it†he said pointing to the apple, and speaking in an odd accent. “Yeah…†I replied in a less than enthusiastic tone. “I wasn’t sure what to say at this point, not that I really cared.†He looked at me, and then smiled. “Its okay, you can keep it†he said as he slowly walked to the conrary side of the cobblestone path. I started walking down the path again; looked at the apple, rubbed it clean, and bit it, was somewhat bitter, but I ate it whole. Yet once I ate it I felt a sense of guilt over me for some reason. “Maybe we can’t change our fate, but somehow mine seems to be changing…â€
umm, i really don't understand much of these two poems except the last one when i read the last part of it. the first one...i can't quite grasp it....except some parts.
seriously. you can really see this kind of activity growing in the spamzone. people lets try to be cooperative, as much as fun flaming can be, lets try and work things out.
lol....i'm not so sure...but hey....the KH universe is a whacky thing.
it is...but if you ever want to write something original, you can always ask for help you know. but, lately its really hard to write something original.
Lord of the rings....this is good read...aside from some grammar. just one thing....this is cookie cutter, the plot you are trying to incorporate is something many writters have done...in a lot of fantasies. even though it pained me to say that, because it IS a good read, the style isn't elaborated on with too much descriptiveness and genre use, and thus its easy to read, i enjoyed it greatly. but...the plot thing...has been used times again , in the past.
i liked the part where sora leaves Twilight town for the first time, as he says goodbye a tear falls out of his face....this part was really sad. when sora reads kairi's letter.... also when sora and riku are in the darkness and they plan on staying there...that place was so quiet....
Truly, a game needs music. i was greatly pleased with Xenosaga 3 because the music was amazing. considering the 2 first games music wasn't all that good, the music factor really helped.
the new parasite eve is for the PSP and its gonna be called the 3rd birthday. Aqua is the coolest one of the three...i mean, she actually confronts maleficent on her own....looking for answers probably seeing as she was talking to the mirror that doesn't lie.
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