I'm sick of this

I' m almost completely unfamiliar with Mormon beliefs, I mostly know about the catholics beliefs but hopefully they' re close enough that what I' ll say will get through.

I' ve called myself a Christian up until I was, idk, 17 or 18. If I' m honest I never truly believed in god, the idea seemed as fishy as Santa to me from starters, but I did give him a try. The more I grew up the more inquisitive I became, I' m not the type who takes anything on faith. I need an explanation, and it better be darn good. Problem was the more I tried to make sense of religion the more ludicrous it seemed. Yet I was still hesitant to send it all to the bin. See, what if there really was a hell ?

Eventually I figured out that if there was a god and he was mad at me for being intellectually honest with myself then that god was a dick. That was the first crack in the wall, the begining of the process that made me a full-fledged atheist.

 

You can be whomever, and do whatever you want. I'm not that into religion but I know there is some group out there that will accept you for who you are. God is not judgmental.. just the people that follow him are. (from the way I see it). Please don't take this the wrong way.. but if you really wanna talk to someone I'm always here.

 

My question to you would be, did the Mormon god ever bothered to explain why being gay is bad ? If it' s just "well he said it was" then screw that. If you can' t think of any good reason why it' s bad and he can' t be bothered to explain why it' s bad ... well then there' s no good reason to follow that particular command, is there ?

 

ARRIGHT, SO.

Admittedly I don't know much about the Mormon faith. But I was raised Catholic, and I DO know a thing or two about ideological discrimination and the stubbornness of certain faiths. I would urge you to check out this video, first off; if the doctrine that tells you homosexuality is a sin comes from the Bible, it will probably be an enormous load off your mind, but even Mormon-specific scriptures suffer similar ambiguities, as described in this article.

So that's the semantics side of it. But you and I both know that's not what's important. What we know isn't nearly as important as how we feel; and certainty pales in comparison to faith. I no longer profess the same faith, but I know I believe this much: If there is a loving God, He does not discriminate the way His followers do. He loves, and that is all. No mortal tongue can disseminate His Word, and no mortal mind can profess to know His Works - but all are welcome to His Love.

They cannot be certain. They can never be certain. All they can do is have faith. And that's all you can do. Have faith that God loves ALL of His children, and that His teachings are not so easily knowable; that they appear differently to each viewer, and that those differences are part of the miracle of life, which God loves so much. Have faith that you will be loved, no matter your choices. And never lose heart, because you are loved.

 

I know you said you preferred that we didn't say anything here but honestly you're a really great person Tale, and I'd feel ashamed if I wasn't able to try and give you advice..Even if you don't necessarily want it and just wanted to vent.
If you want, you can decide to gloss over this. I won't mind. I just have to say my part.

Now as a bisexual, I've been in a similar situation as you. It's not exactly the same thing since I am still attracted to the opposite sex which is more acceptable by societal and religious terms, but I did find out that I was attracted to men at a very young age and this confused me greatly. I did lie to myself for quite a long time, and it certainly didn't do any good for my general well being. Coming to terms with who I am and being proud of myself despite what some people might think is something that made me realize how happy I had become.
I know you love your religion, and I would never ask you to forsake it. That's disrespectful and wrong. What I will say that if someone tells you to be someone you're not and to repress a large part of who you are, then they're in the wrong. Trust me when I say that doing so will only cause you pain.
And I'm no religious person by any means, but how can anyone truly love you if they don't know who you are? Who's to say that you can't be non-heterosexual and practice a religion? The followers don't necessarily preach what is right.

It won't be an easy road, I'll tell you that much. Stay strong and stay vigilant.
If you ever need someone to talk to, we're here for ya.

 

I don't think I can help you with this Tale. I'm a Lutheran and I'm fairly sure I'm straight (as soon as I actually date someone, I'll probably be surely sure). I don't know much about the Mormon religion and I can't relate to being prejudiced against because of sexual orientation. I'll always be here to listen if you need to vent. So hang in there, dear rigging ninja and balloon animal maker. We'll be here when you need us.

 

I couldn't possibly tell you how to go about making everything okay. In the religion department I'm not too keen. I'm agnostic so it's pretty much go with the flow. The best possible option I could think of is to stay true to yourself. Religion isn't, at least from what I've seen, always set in stone in terms of rules and whatnot. You can choose to remain a Mormon but that doesn't mean you can't follow it in your own way. I chose not to be a part of religion because I couldn't bring myself to follow anything that would condemn someone based on their sexuality, as well as many other things. I think you need to find your own path. Don't force yourself to be something you're not. I hope you can find the way that makes you happy.

-Snow Queen

 

I face that a lot with a family that used to go to an evangelical church. I still consider myself a Christian, not apart of the church, and I still feel weird there as a supporter for gay rights and such. People are going to say that you're picking and choosing from the bible, but I've learned that those people who say that also pick and choose verses to suit them. It's all a moot point.

It's okay to have a strong faith in something but have those urges. We're human, so we're not human. If others in your church tell you crap and treat you unfairly, I would say that they're not real Christians. You're allowed to believe in what you want and love who you want. No one cans force you otherwise, and no one should.

Still, it takes a lot of courage to say that, especially with your situation, and I admire that

 

I forgot to mention it, but I was lucky enough to be raised in a society, and a family, where being atheist is a non-issue. It was no coming out at all for me.

Even if you do manage to reconcile your faith with your homosexuality, being accepted by your religious community might be a tougher nut to crack. You might want to refrain from coming out to your parents as long as you' re financially dependant if you know them to be highly opiniated on the subject.

If it was me I' d put the topic on the table, with my parents and at sunday school, see where that gets me. Wait for the topic to be brought up on the news or something if you don' t want to raise red flags. Beforehand I' d make sure I' m ready to counter the points they' re bound to raise.

 

Tale, you are amazing for sharing this! I was going through exactly the same thing as you are a few years back. I would say it was more a phase for me but there were 2 girls I fancied quite strongly and it lasted a long while and what made it worse was I knew them from church. I didn't tell anyone for so long because I was so scared of getting judged and being ridiculed so I bottled it up for about a year. When at long last I opened up to my friend (in fact, it was one of the girls I liked) she was very understanding and helped me by praying over me and teaching me ways of getting the thoughts out of my head- this only worked for me because it was a phase as opposed to me being bisexual. I can still rememebr her saying "although I don't agree with it, I understand" which made me feel better but looking back on it, I am glad things happened the way they did but if someone came to me now struggling with the same problem I would tell them that it's okay, there is nothing wrong with it- God made you this way, it is illogical to make someone built to do something you don't like fully well knowing they will do it.

Sadly, some people don't agree with this and they will judge you, I can't sugar coat it but they shouldn't, Christians (or Mormons :3) are both the least and most judgmental people on this planet I think which shouldn't be the case but is ;-; I don't think you should have to suppress who you are for your faith, you'll be unhappy if you are forced into a situation you hate. I don't see why you can't have both your faith and be true to yourself, anyway, I am sorry, I know how you feel and I wish I could help in some better way.

 

Oh Tale, I'm sorry that you have to go through this. Honestly, this is the thing that I hate most about religions: they accept you until they don't. There's no reason why being a Mormon and liking guys should be mutually exclusive. You should be able to do both without there being any backlash against you, but clearly not everyone is so open-minded. One of the reasons I'm hesitant to associate myself with the religion I was raised with is because everyone who follows it is so ridiculous in their train of thought. Honestly, if God exists, he created you to be you, nothing more and nothing less. If His believers can't accept that crucial fact, then who's really defying His word? You deserve to be happy, but if that means finding a new group of people to talk to about it, then so be it. I mean, we're all here for you no matter what religion you associate with or who you love. Your friend was absolutely right with what he said as well -- sometimes, you have to give up something good to get something even better. But if that "something good" comes with the kind of pain that these groups are putting you through, it's best if you avoid them. I'm sure there's another LDS group who gets it, and these people just aren't it.
Sometimes, the people you think are your friends turn out to be anything but, and that's fine. Honestly, that's just how it goes sometimes, but things will get better, I promise you. There are 7 billion people in this world, and no matter how different we all are, there's always someone out there who gets it. You just have to go out and find them.